Behavior: Taking items not hers

RNMatras

My mom is in MC unit and has been taking things from other resident rooms. Anyone else have this issue? What are they doing to manage the behavior?

jfkoc

"borrowing"....a common problem. I do not think is can be managed. Perhaps the best remedy is to clearly mark items with the owners name so that they can be returned when discovered.

easy23

The other residents should close their doors and lock them if they can.

Anonymousjpl123

Yes - my mom had had people take her things. She usually doesn’t notice but the staff are fairly on top of it and regularly keep tabs on those who “borrow” or take. They often have a bag of clothes for me to give back to my mom: who also tends to try to give everything away.

BassetHoundAnn

"Shopping" is common in memory cares. Usually the staff keep a watch on residents who tend to wander into others' rooms and try to nab them before they head into another resident's room. Sometimes they do lock doors to keep frequent shoppers from riffling through others' rooms.

I have all of my mom's belongings marked with her name and even room number, everything from pictures to shoes, blankets, sheets and the Alzheimer's clock, and of course all her clothing.

One day her TV remote went missing and I found it in a pile in the TV room with other "stolen" or misplaced TV remotes from other residents' rooms. So now the remote has her name on it too.

I keep an eye on her room and if I spot something that isn't hers I return it to the aid or its owner if it's marked.

harshedbuzz

Dementia robbed my dad of the initiative to leave his room unless coerced, but we saw a lot of this behavior in the MCF. In my state, MCF are licensed similarly to personal care facilities and must has a self-locking door, but dad liked his open (the FOMO remained well into the disease) which invites this behavior. Dad was more annoyed by the visits than the missing items.

Deterrents employed at dad's MCF included discouraging family from bringing valuable or irreplaceable items to the facility, labeling everything so it could be returned, locking doors, a full day and evening program of dementia-informed activities to keep residents busy and engaged. They even had several group walks daily which included known wanderers with an aide who would gently redirect the behavior.

It's super common. So common it goes by many names-- borrowing, shopping and hunter-gathering.

HB