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I give Mom (91) food but she forgets about it and doesn't eat it

Patrick99
Patrick99 Member Posts: 4
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This is a relatively new and now repeating occurrence in her deterioration. Is this common? My wife and I will have to help her to eat her food because she is no longer able to manage that task alone. What stage of dementia might she be in at this point? Thank you.

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  • M1
    M1 Member Posts: 6,788
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    Hi Patrick, sounds pretty advanced. A lot of individuals in late stage disease need help eating, and swallowing problems are also common. Have you thought about calling for a hospice evaluation? You don't need a doctor's order for that, and they can provide a lot of help.

  • harshedbuzz
    harshedbuzz Member Posts: 4,778
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    @Patrick99

    Which stage will depend on what "help" looks like. If she can follow verbal prompts to pick up and eat food, that's more of a late stage 6 behavior. Sometimes easier to eat foods-- pre-cut or finger foods-- are more appropriate at this point. My aunt kind of straddled this stage; she needed to be fed cereal, eggs, soups, etc. but could hold and nibble a cookie or a small piece of sandwich.

    If you need to hand-feed to get her to eat, that is stage 7. When my aunt reached this stage, we found she'd go off eating for a week or so and then resume eating. She did this 3 or 4 times in the last two years of her life.

    I agree with M1 that a hospice evaluation would be a good idea.

    HB

  • Patrick99
    Patrick99 Member Posts: 4
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    Thank you. She's been in Hospice Home Healthcare for approximately 6 months.

  • mommyandme (m&m)
    mommyandme (m&m) Member Posts: 1,468
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    edited October 2023

    Sorry you’re having to go through these things. Sounds like stage 7 to me. Is hospice coming to mom’s (your) home? Or is it a home setting run by hospice? Sorry for my ignorance. I would think hospice could stage her too.

    While my mom was still interested in food, I’d feed her and/or offer finger foods…which depended on the day and type of meal. Mom lost her ability to understand utensils. In late stage 7, my mom didn’t lose her interest in food until she contracted Covid and suddenly started her end of life transition. If your mom isn’t interested in eating then I might say she may be starting towards the transitioning stage. Not knowing what to do with the food or how to eat is unfortunately common. Offering easy to swallow foods and nutritional drinks like Ensure may help get her some valuable calories.

    Hope you find some answers and solutions that work.

  • Patrick99
    Patrick99 Member Posts: 4
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    Great suggestion on the Ensure! Thank you! I'm going to make sure to have soft foods for Mom going forward and will help her to eat, as I started doing today.

  • Jadmyfav06
    Jadmyfav06 Member Posts: 6
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    Hey everyone. I was told today from the nursing home staff that my mom can not feed herself using utensils anymore. She will pick up the food off the plate sometime or allow someone to hand it to her and eat a little but she can't use utensils anymore. Is this stage 7 of alzheimer's?

  • Marta
    Marta Member Posts: 694
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    Doesn’t matter what stage you call it. What are you doing about it?

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
Read more