mom won't agree to in home help

irene912

My mom has dementia, can't be alone. She's staying with me. I've been trying to have an aide come a couple days a week. Mom is so resistant. She cuts the visits short, one day wouldn't let the aide in her house, and another day got upset when she discovered we're paying the aide, so the aide left.

I'm getting pushed by my sister to put mom in assisted living but I want to TRY everything I can at home before I do that. So this HAS to work. I need help & can't be home 24/7 with mom. How do I get mom to just allow the aide to be in the house? Please help!

harshedbuzz

This is one of the reasons we placed dad in MC (it sounds like your mom might be passed a hospitality model AL already). He could not and would not accept caregiving from aides coming into the home. We did eventually find a pretty younger woman he didn't mind visiting but he wouldn't accept care from her just visits. This was OK from a safety standpoint if mom wanted a hair cut or needed to see her doctor but it wasn't sustainable once incontinence set in.

irene912

harshedbuzz That's what I'm afraid of. If this won't work, I DON'T WANT to place mom in a facility yet :(

All mom allowed so far is driving her to the salon & chatting, won't let the aide get her lunch or anything. And eating is one of the most important things she needs to do.