Help mom with Alzheimer’s

chase7961

My mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s in March of this year and she still will not acknowledge the diagnosis she she is convinced there is a conspiracy with all the doctors and me her only daughter that we are out to get her

my moms GP has had her drivers license revoked and blames the doctor and me for that and anyone else she can think of

she has convinced my dad who has short term memory loss of her delusions

my mom will not allow me go to any dr appts my mom is 85 and I don’t know what to do if I ask any type of questions she gets very angry with me

SusanB-dil

Hi chase7961 - welcome to 'here', but sorry for the reason. You've found the right place for support and answers.

Your mom has anosognosia. (encourage you to look it up) It is not denial, but it is rather, her truth that nothing is wrong. Arguing or trying to convince her otherwise will only get her more angry, and both of you frustrated.

Is paperwork in order? DPOA and HIPPA accesses are crucial right now. If you don't have HIPPA accesses, you can still talk to her doctor, but they cannot legally converse back to you.

One way to handle the driving is to disable the car. If you can, make it 'go away' (disappear the car). Fiblets will become your friend. Even if you cannot disappear it, do disable it. "The car had a recall and the part is on backorder." repeat and repeat again as necessary.

Since you mention your dad is having memory issues as well, do check to make sure bills are not overdue and food is not expired.

Rule #1 - do not argue with PWD Rule #2 - see Rule #1 Rule #3 - you must take care of you through this lousy journey.

M1

Sounds like you need to have power of attorney for both your parents. A certified elder law attorney can help with this as well as with financial planning should they both need Medicaid eligibility to fund long-term care. Look for lists by location at nelf.org.