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My journey is over

DH died on Nov. 24th and yesterday I had the Mass for him and the burial. Several of my family members were here flying in from distant states or driving for 8 hrs or more. As I posted after his death, he had been in Memory Care for 15 months. He died a peaceful death and I had just seen him 11 hrs before. Even though he was non verbal, he was able to play some wooden puzzle games and matching card games and we kissed each other goodbye before I left and said " See you tomorrow." He was able to use his walker and just had eaten his pureed Thanksgiving dinner. He had been on Hospice for 11 months but they were shocked he died when he did as they just saw him a day or 2 before.

This is the strangest feeling. He was 93 and 1/2 and had Alzheimer's for 7 and 1/2 yrs. After his brain surgery 5 and 1/2 yrs ago, I took care of him for 4 yrs . Rationally it is a blessing that he passed away but I weep knowing that I will never see him again.

I want to thank all those who supported me and all the wonderful help I have received being here. For those on the fence re: when to place, please consider it. My decision was made for me as he broke his ankle and was incontinent. I am thankful I didn't suffer major health issues but I am sure I would had I continued to take care of him in our apartment. The staff at the Memory Care just loved him and took care of him and I could visit often as he was nearby.


My prayers are with all of you on this journey. I will check in here on occasion but for the most part will not continue to check in often. I hope some of my previous postings have helped other members.

Comments

  • Iris L.
    Iris L. Member Posts: 4,455
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    Member

    Elshack, I am so sorry for your loss. Please accept my condolences.

    Iris

  • M1
    M1 Member Posts: 6,788
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    Member

    Will miss you. Thank you for all your help and contributions. Blessings for this new stage 8.

  • Jeff86
    Jeff86 Member Posts: 684
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    Elshack, you’ve been a tireless caregiver and a generous poster here. I wish you peace in Stage 8; my journey is like yours as my DW also passed on Nov. 24. Agree with you it’s a strange place to be.

  • JeriLynn66
    JeriLynn66 Member Posts: 866
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    God bless and keep you…

  • White Crane
    White Crane Member Posts: 904
    Seventh Anniversary 250 Care Reactions 500 Comments 100 Likes
    Member

    Dear Elshack, my heart goes out to you at this time. I’m so sorry for the loss of your dear husband. Thank you for all your help on this forum. God bless you and keep you in his peace.

    Brenda

  • mrahope
    mrahope Member Posts: 538
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    Member

    So sorry to hear of your loss. May his memory be a blessing. Wishing you peace and healing.

  • Howaboutnow
    Howaboutnow Member Posts: 133
    100 Care Reactions 100 Comments 25 Insightfuls Reactions 25 Likes
    Member

    I’m sorry for the loss of your DH. Your last words, “see you tomorrow” ❤️. A Blessing his final day sounded so peaceful.

  • ghphotog
    ghphotog Member Posts: 686
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    Member

    I'm so sorry for your loss of your Dear Husband. I'm glad he passed peacefully but I know how you must be missing him. I'm sure he knew you loved him until the very end. Love is one thing that is never lost.

  • midge333
    midge333 Member Posts: 337
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    Member

    I am sorry for your loss.

  • Jgirl57
    Jgirl57 Member Posts: 503
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    I imagine you are exhausted after all this so I wish you some rest and peace in “stage 8”

  • FaustinaMary
    FaustinaMary Member Posts: 7
    First Comment
    Member
    > @Elshack said:
    > DH died on Nov. 24th and yesterday I had the Mass for him and the burial. Several of my family members were here flying in from distant states or driving for 8 hrs or more. As I posted after his death, he had been in Memory Care for 15 months. He died a peaceful death and I had just seen him 11 hrs before. Even though he was non verbal, he was able to play some wooden puzzle games and matching card games and we kissed each other goodbye before I left and said " See you tomorrow." He was able to use his walker and just had eaten his pureed Thanksgiving dinner. He had been on Hospice for 11 months but they were shocked he died when he did as they just saw him a day or 2 before.
    > This is the strangest feeling. He was 93 and 1/2 and had Alzheimer's for 7 and 1/2 yrs. After his brain surgery 5 and 1/2 yrs ago, I took care of him for 4 yrs . Rationally it is a blessing that he passed away but I weep knowing that I will never see him again.
    > I want to thank all those who supported me and all the wonderful help I have received being here. For those on the fence re: when to place, please consider it. My decision was made for me as he broke his ankle and was incontinent. I am thankful I didn't suffer major health issues but I am sure I would had I continued to take care of him in our apartment. The staff at the Memory Care just loved him and took care of him and I could visit often as he was nearby.
    >
    > My prayers are with all of you on this journey. I will check in here on occasion but for the most part will not continue to check in often. I hope some of my previous postings have helped other members.
  • Jo C.
    Jo C. Member Posts: 2,950
    Legacy Membership 2500 Comments 250 Likes 100 Care Reactions
    Member

    Dearest Elshack; with heartfelt condolences on your loss, may peace and serenity soon be with you. Despite a LOs death, we continue to be part of this loving and supportive electronic family; that of course includes you too, so I do hope we will continue to see you here; you have been very helpful and a caring person.

    With a warm hug being sent your way,

    J>

  • JoseyWales
    JoseyWales Member Posts: 621
    Eighth Anniversary 500 Comments 100 Care Reactions 25 Likes
    Member

    Dear Elshack - I'm so sorry to hear of your husband's passing. I've followed your journey, and I'm glad you shared your experiences here. May you find peace and wonderful memories in the days ahead.

  • mrspgee
    mrspgee Member Posts: 8
    Third Anniversary 5 Likes First Comment
    Member

    Sending loving thoughts as you continue on your own journey. I wish you peace and many happy memories.

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
Read more