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New here and trying to start vascular dementia discussions

FaustinaMary
FaustinaMary Member Posts: 7
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Hello,
I am FaustinaMary and am hoping to learn more from you. My loved parent is supposed as suffering from vascular dementia after an extended bout of rapid ventricular response. I am hoping to begin a subgroup here for those associated with "Vascular Dementia". Please join it for discussions if this pertains to you, your loved one, or if you have something to add to the topic. Thank you!

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  • JSpalding
    JSpalding Member Posts: 4
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    Hi. Lately I have spent a lot of time with my parents. My dad has had memory loss for a few years now but I found out he was diagnosed with vascular dementia after getting a brain scan. However, he does not have a neurologist and the only people to see the scan are his psychologist and the person who read it. I am pushing my stepmom to get him another brain scan by a neurologist. He ran a red light and hit a lady a few years ago. (No injuries) Then on the 15th of December he ran a stop sign and hit a van which caused them both to spin around. The lady in the van was ok but my dad broke his sternum. He does not want to give up driving. Seeing him in this mental state is so hard because he was a farmer and was so strong and focused. I have been told that there are meds to stop or slow down his condition. I am open to any advice or knowledge of Vascular Dementia.

    Thank you.

    Jennifer Spalding

  • M1
    M1 Member Posts: 6,788
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    edited December 2023

    Welcome Jennifer. Despite your other questions, here's the bottom line: take his keys tonight. He cannot drive any more. Period, end stop. You are going to have a lot of other people piling on about this.

    Faustina Mary, i think you tried once before for a discussion specific to vascular dementia? There's so much overlap with possible Alzheimer's i don't know if there will be enough traffic to distinguish between the two. I guess time will tell....

  • FaustinaMary
    FaustinaMary Member Posts: 7
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    There sure is overlap. Another health care person stopped by to see my mom one day. She said that in her personal opinion she doesn't think my mom has vascular dementia because vascular dementia comes on fast. This nurse also said that mom probably suffered some brain damage when she had the cardiac complications this past summer. Then this nurse went on to say that Alzheimer's is very inherited. My mom's Aunt and an Uncle had Alzheimer's disease.

    I recalled that even before the cardiac rhythm complications, my Mom had been complaining to me for a while about how her mind was going and how she was concerned.

  • SusanB-dil
    SusanB-dil Member Posts: 1,231
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    Hi FaustinaMary - MIL has alz and vascular... M1 is correct, there is much overlap. With MIL, between the two, when there is a 'step down', it is probably a more drastic decline than if there were only one form of the dementias.

    @JSpalding - I agree about the driving - disappear the keys asap! He already has a diagnosis?! First of all, what if he really injures an innocent party? A child walking a dog? If he hurts more than a broken bone or worse?!!! Also, should something further happen, insurance is not required to cover anything. nothing. In a suit, he could lose everything... It is difficult to get one to cease driving. Who has POA? When we took MIL off the road, we disabled the car (and told our helpful neighbor please don't replace the wire). We told her there was a defective part and it is on backorder. She is used to not driving now, and I think is even afraid to. I see where a lot of folks go ahead and get rid of the car so the 'reminder' is no longer there.

    The cocktail of meds that MIL is on has slowed some progression (without being 'zombie-ish'). We know that the decline is inevitable, and yes, it is difficult to see our LO, who was such a vibrant person, in this way. You are correct in getting an appointment with a neurologist. We have one on our team. They can prescribe for the agitation and can adjust dosage when needed.

  • JSpalding
    JSpalding Member Posts: 4
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    Well his truck is totaled so we don't have to worry about him driving. Today is his primary care doctor appointment and I told my stepmom I want him to have another brain scan and a neurologist. She is POA for him and I am anxious to see what the doctor says. Dad is a happy-go-lucky guy with a optimistic attitude. My husband rode with him a couple of weeks ago and Dad seemed to zone out and ended up at a dead end road. He has been through some traumatic things the last couple of years which has added to his stress.

  • Anonymousjpl123
    Anonymousjpl123 Member Posts: 711
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    Hi Jennifer welcome to the forum and I’m sorry about your dad. It sounds like he has been through a lot, and it’s good you are looking out for him. Have you talked to your stepmom about his condition and diagnosis? Does she acknowledge what’s happening and how hard things have been? I do hope he can get a brain scan, and also that you can get more information from the neurologist. Though I will say, as someone who worked really hard to get the diagnosis, sadly, this is a progressive disease so there will probably have to be some planning for things down the line. POA is key, and working with your stepmom, is key, as your dad may need others to make decisions for him, such as ending the driving now.

    I am so sorry you are dealing with this, but you have found a good place for advice and support.

  • JSpalding
    JSpalding Member Posts: 4
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    Thank you. Yes my dad has indeed suffered a lot of emotional stress the last few years. He lived in the same house on 40 acres nearly 50 years and warehouses and factories have taken over. Although it was a blessing in disguise, seeing your house and farm bulldozed down and disappearing is traumatic. My stepmom planned ahead when built their new house. It has an elevator, is handicap ready, and has a full basement with kitchen, bathroom, and two bedrooms in case a caregiver needs to live there someday. They lived in a rental house for the last year and a half till their new place was done and moved in last Wednesday just in time for Christmas. My sister has hurt him deeply during all this as well. It's a long story. Everyone says she is a narcissist but she is out of his life. So he lost his home, totaled his truck, and lost his daughter at the same time.

  • gilrami2
    gilrami2 Member Posts: 1
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    Hi FaustinaMary and all. My mom (81) was DX with vascular dementia about 2yrs ago. It has progressed and looking at the different stages she's at stage 6. I have relocated to support my father and brother who were caring for her. The last 8 months have been tragic to see someone change so much. There are so many things to discuss or share but I'll keep it limited for now. Can't point to an event where it may have all begun but yes she has had plenty or trauma or emotional destress throughout the years. Now on med, some days better than others. Dealing now with sundowners, seems to be increasing in frequency, urination in bed, sleeping to much. Seems like any infection, especially UTI will make her mor irate, hostile, confused, etc., so we look for mood swings and call dr. The most surprising thing I see is the decline of my dad, while he says he's less stressed with all the help he has now, the decline is apparent. I will be looking to the discussion to see how work with LO on conversations about what she has, how to get on a better sleep cycle, how to help her during sundowners episodes, and how to keep a regular bathing cycle. Looking forward to share and help anyone with a LO in the same situation.
  • Barko2024
    Barko2024 Member Posts: 2
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    Hi Gilrami2 and everyone, My mom is in the middle stages of what appears to be vascular dementia, she has diabetes and other health issues, so the neurologist labeled it vascular. She has struggled with UTI's, but now that she has a health care worker every morning to help out my 87 year old dad it seems like we have them under control. Lots of water, better hygiene, and changing her Depend under garnet more frequently seem to be helping. She is also plagued with sundowners. It used to be only in the evenings, but now it happens sometimes in the morning. Soft music and a light box have helped a bit. Her neurologist is trying her on the drug Memantine and it seems to help with her focus and it is easier to reason with her. She is on 5mg every morning. When they tried to increase it she got a really bad headache. Anyone else have a loved one taking this med? Thanks everyone:) Lisa


  • Mimi50
    Mimi50 Member Posts: 144
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    Hi my husband was diagnosed with vascular dementia last year. He is still in the beginning stages.

  • mommyandme (m&m)
    mommyandme (m&m) Member Posts: 1,468
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    Hi Barko, welcome to here. My mom was on Memantine for quite awhile. She started it prior to moving here near me so I could care for her 24/7. She stayed on it but I didn’t really know what it did for her. Finally , with hospice’s blessing, I started to titrate her off of it. She was taking so many things and with “pill burden” we were trying to reduce the amount of meds she had to endure. (This was prior to her meds being smashed and mixed with yogurt). While I was weening her off of it I noticed it was harder for her to follow simple commands. I put her back up to her regular dosage and things came back. I tried twice to titrate her off of it, with the same result, so I left it in her med cocktail for the duration. You say your mom may focus better with Memantine which makes sense to me. I think its a subtle help, but a help I was thankful for.

  • Barko2024
    Barko2024 Member Posts: 2
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    Thanks for you response. I couldn't agree more with what you've experienced with your mom. I think I just wanted some reassurance:)

  • H1235
    H1235 Member Posts: 644
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    My mother in-law had Alzheimer’s and my mom now has vascular dementia. Yes there is some over lap, but they are very different. My mother in law could not remember thing. She still had that feeling of being in control. She didn’t know she was forgetting and in a way it made a lot of things easier. My mom with dementia has mild memory issues but is not able to think logically. Mom thinks she is perfectly capable of mowing the lawn since it’s as easy as pushing her walker. My mother inlaw would just assume she was the one that mowed the lawn. When I ask for advice on the forum It’s often suggested to just do … she won’t remember anyway. But with vascular dementia she does remember and is not happy when things are not done her way. It’s way easier to listen to the same story several times in a visit than it is to here how mad mom is that we won’t let her use the power washer.

  • Mimi50
    Mimi50 Member Posts: 144
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    My husband also sees the doctor next week. After reading some discussions. I went to the Illinois DMV website. The state of Illinois requires anyone diagnosed with dementia. To have doctor fill out form sign it saying it is safe to drive. I downloaded the form saved it on my tablet. So I can print it and take it with us. I told my husband that unless the doctor, says it is safe,for him to drive. He won't be driving. At first he tried to argue with me. I informed him that it was my job to make decisions he can't make any longer. I don't have to be the one telling him he can't drive. The doctor will be. I am going to need medical release form to,drive also. Some problems with my vision at night so there will be more restrictions for me too. So try the website for the state your Dad lives in. The DMV will have some kind of requirements for people with dementia and driving.

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
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