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For those who are grieving

BethL
BethL Member Posts: 875
Ninth Anniversary 500 Comments 100 Likes 25 Care Reactions
Member

YOU DON’T JUST LOSE SOMEONE ONCE

You lose them over and over,

sometimes in the same day.

When the loss, momentarily forgotten,

creeps up,

and attacks you from behind.

Fresh waves of grief as the realisation hits home,

they are gone.

Again.

You don’t just lose someone once,

you lose them every time you open your eyes to a new dawn,

and as you awaken,

so does your memory,

so does the jolting bolt of lightning that rips into your heart,

they are gone.

Again.

Losing someone is a journey,

not a one-off.

There is no end to the loss,

there is only a learned skill on how to stay afloat,

when it washes over.

Be kind to those who are sailing this stormy sea,

they have a journey ahead of them,

and a daily shock to the system each time they realise,

they are gone,

Again.

You don’t just lose someone once,

you lose them every day,

for a lifetime.

Comments

  • Lorita
    Lorita Member Posts: 4,520
    Legacy Membership 2500 Comments 100 Care Reactions 100 Likes
    Member

    Beth, thanks for posting this. It is so very true. And, it isn't over in a couple of years. I still grieve for the loss of my parenrs, thirteen months apart, twenty eight years ago and for my husband, nine years ago. I doubt a person ever gets over these losses.

  • Thriver
    Thriver Member Posts: 1
    Third Anniversary First Comment
    Member

    Beth, your post is right on the mark. It tears me up to see her. I never get a chance to heal. I had to place her in a memory case facility in July after being home with her for 5 years. The last 2 was horrible. 2 weeks ago, I was told that I need to find her a "Secure Facility". They want her out, she try's to escape I am in a panic!!! Not again

  • RobertsBrown
    RobertsBrown Member Posts: 143
    Sixth Anniversary 10 Comments 5 Likes 5 Care Reactions
    Member

    I came here today to share exactly this feeling.

    This is so current and so real. I hate that I am alone in this.

    We are fellow travelers.

    R-

  • marier
    marier Member Posts: 65
    Sixth Anniversary 25 Likes 25 Care Reactions 10 Comments
    Member

    So very true. Well said.

  • ghphotog
    ghphotog Member Posts: 686
    500 Care Reactions 500 Comments 100 Insightfuls Reactions 100 Likes
    Member

    Yes, so very true! For me it's both the loss of my DW daily but also the loss of my life as the daily grind takes it's toll as I care for a woman that I care deeply for and drifts further and further away every day. Two losses. Will I make it another 2 or 3 years doing this if I have to?

    Two losses as she forgets both herself and I and I'm watch this unstoppable demise happen in front of me.

  • Joydean
    Joydean Member Posts: 1,500
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary 100 Care Reactions 100 Likes
    Member

    Thank you so much for sharing! The lost just keeps on growing!

  • JeriLynn66
    JeriLynn66 Member Posts: 866
    500 Comments 100 Care Reactions 100 Likes 25 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    Thank you Beth.

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
Read more