Acting out in MC

Hwood

Hello. We tearfully placed my father in memory care earlier this month. He is in the transition phase in which we have agreed not to contact him. The head nurse (who is wonderful) has been good with communication and we are aware that my father struggles with sundowners and can become angry and frustrated easily esp during these evening times. We have had reports that he is adapting and being social although has bouts of sadness and confusion. Today we learned that he is becoming agitated and even aggressive with other Katie to. He recently tried to get a fellow patient that has trouble with communication and walking to walk with him by pulling on his arm. Fortunately a CNS was able to overhear and intervene.

i am concerned about my fathers wellbeing and the wellbeing of those around him and was mortified and to hear this.

What should I say to the caregivers in this situation? Any suggestions as to handle this from my end (out of state) or theirs?

thank you!

terei

Ask the facility if he should be assessed for medication to help with his behaviors. What you are describing is not unusual at all for PWD + the facility should be able to handle all be the most extreme behaviors. They are reporting his condition to you, as they do with all residents there. He has been there only a brief period + it is not uncommon for it to take weeks or months for your LO to settle in. Try not to worry

Hwood

Thank you. He is not acting out to our knowledge anymore but is showing a lot of anxiety. He’s now been in memory care for one month. He is very depressed and talks about escaping with each visit. He is also very tearful and begs us to come get him. This is so difficult. I never imagined he would suffer so much.

im second guessing our decision to place him there and wondering if he e W’s oils be better off in my home.

eaglemom

I believe he is still in a form of transition to the new surrounding. And your feeling are normal also, wondering if you've done the correct thing. This is all new to the both of you. Yes, its been a month, but a month isn't a very long time to adjust to this newness.

You might discuss with his physician about his anxiety. Their are medications that can help that without making him sleep. They just slightly take the edge off everything for him. As an aside, I would ask if he is sleeping at night. If he's not resting well at night that could add to, but not cause, some anxiety.

eagle