Too much drama

emhanson

My DH has vascular dementia. He will "lock on" to something that bothers him and shake it to death like a dog with a toy. That is, he won't let it go. Today we had a blizzard. He can't shovel/snow blow because of a heart condition. He wants me to find someone to do this. I did find a service that has been quite good. But with this blizzard, they were overwhelmed and didn't get to us right away. He totally freaked out. He demanded that I call them. I finally did so mid afternoon. When I did, they said they would come to us next, even though they would be working into the evening. DH was very angry and out there firing up the snowblower. I told him they were on the way. They did come, but then DH was angry at the job they did. He kept making me look at everyone else's driveways to see how much better theirs looked. He was angry and wanted me to know it. I don't know what to do. I know it is not called for and is not his fault. But I don't know what to do. I try to calm him down. I do deep breathing. I took a shot of vodka. Maybe I'm too close to this to figure it out.

M1

First thing that comes to mind is additional meds for his anxiety/aggression. Perhaps worth a phone call?

Pat6177

If this is a sudden change, check for a UTI.

avieDa921)

My DA would focus on one thing and not drop the subject for a couple of hours. It was that long because he kept repeating himself. I felt like I was in the movie, “Groundhog Day.” He’s been on meds for 2 weeks now, not much anxiety & hardly any agitation!

I’m not so stressed anymore!!

emhanson

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/194667#Comment_194667

Yes, I contacted his doctor.

Katielu

Enhanson,

my DH has VD. He will do the same thing. Sometimes ( not always, but worth a try) I leave the room for a short time, and come back with new topic, one he will fixate on but not need me to make a call for ( politics, a issue someone else is having) that kind of thing. Sometimes it helps, sometimes it doesn’t. I have given him phone numbers to make calls, this never goes well as he can’t get his point across or it doesn’t make sense to the person on the other end and it drops. Zoloft has helped this quite a bit and Jim beam is relief is all else fails.

Leesee

My DH was initially diagnosed with FTD in Sept. New Neurologist (much better than the fist) said not FTD, but rather Vascular Dementia with damage in the frontal and temporal lobes. New Neurologist also said that Vascular Dementia and Alzheimer's are often found together (mixed dementia). There is a blood test for Alzheimer's now. My husband had the test and is positive for Alzheimer's. It helps explain some of the other symptoms including his fixation on a topic or situation.

Has your DH been tested for Alzheimer's? Is he on Aricept?

jfkoc

Sometimes listening and agreeing does more than reasoning.

TerrificWeber

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/195221#Comment_195221

There is no reasoning.

Pat6177

While you’re waiting for meds… consider fiblets. When they ask you to make a phone call, pick up the phone and pretend to make the call. Then a fiblet like it’s a busy signal, I’ll try again in an hour. Or pretend to leave a message. Or pretend to talk to the plow guy and give an answer to your DH that he will accept like there’s an accident and they are running behind but will get here. Or a downed power line. You get the idea. And I agree with Jfkoc that listening and agreeing goes a long way to calming them.