Dad's decline - does he realize what's happening

ripscott

My sister and I take care of our 102 year old dad. He's been on hospice since Sept but I think he's been doing fairly well all things considered. The last 2-3 weeks it's like he's dropped off the edge of a cliff. He hasn't had any solid food in almost 2 weeks. The only thing we've managed to get in him is a few spoonfuls of yogurt, applesauce, or ice cream and occasionally a little water with a syringe. It seems like he no longer knows how to swallow. H's so weak he can't speak anymore. He mostly sleeps or lays with his eyes open and stares blankly. He doesn't respond to us anymore. He looks so weak and feeble. It's really heartbreaking . I don't know how long he can go with almost no food and water. I hate that we can't help him.

I guess my question is - does he realize what is happening? Does he understand what's going on? When he lies in the bed with the blank stare I wonder what he thinks is happening to him

M1

I doubt if he's aware ripscott. I take mercy in that belief. It is said that the dying don't feel hunger and thirst as an otherwise healthy person would, and I think there is mercy in that also. They say that hearing is the sense that persists the longest, so that you should talk to him as if he can hear you. I wish you peace, it's never easy at any age.

mommyandme (m&m)

I’m sorry to say that it sounds like he’s transitioning for his next journey. Does hospice have any insight for you? Loving him with peace and comfort seems like a good choice. Playing his favorite music might be nice as he can likely hear you. Being allowed in for a person’s last days, hours and moments is a gift IME. So so hard, I’m very sorry.

Smilinpj

I agree that at this point, playing his favorite music, reading his favorite stories, and reminiscing out loud for him is the best thing you can do. Remember, talking around him he may hear and understand, even though he isn't reacting. My grandfather died this way, just shut down and wouldn't eat or drink. I think they just know it's time and they are ready. You are in my prayers.