New to this Site: Parent has MCI

tbloom73

Hello everyone. My 84yo Mom has been under the care of a neurologist over past 3 years. She was just seen in his office after a year, diagnosed with minimal cognitive impairment, amnesic type. She has insight into her memory issues.

She is not tech savvy but my Dad is. I feel for my Mom going through this. I would like to ask you all here who suffers from various stages of dementia/MCI: how I can best support her?

She is a very stoic person and doesn’t really discuss feelings.
Whenever I ask how she is doing, her canned response is, “I’m doing the best I can.” what she meansby this, she says that she can bathe herself, dress herself, feed herself.

From one cognitively impaired person to another, what would say to her? And what would you recommend to me to best understand and support her?

Thank you for your help.

Iris L.

Welcome tbloom. The majority of PWDs (persons with dementia) have anosognosia which keeps them from being aware of having dementia or realizing the full impact of dementia and its prognosis. If your mom doesn't say much, it is probably because she has anosognosia. This is different from denial. It is best not to confront her. You can support her best by learning about dementia and adapting to her changing needs. Be observant, because she will not tell you what she needs. There is a board for spouses and caregivers, also other caregiver boards. Your dad is welcome to join, also yourself. Read alz.org and the other online reading material. Watch Teepa Snow videos on YouTube. Read a lot of threads. Best wishes!

Iris

tbloom73

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/197036#Comment_197036

Hi Iris,

Thank you for your thoughtful response. I have been perusing Teepa Snow videos, her website and her podcast, as well as the Alzheimer’s website.

Do you suffer from a neuro cognitive problem? If so, what do you find helpful? How can I help my Mom not feel so alone with this condition? She is not tech savvy.

Thanks again.

Iris L.

Do not let your mom be alone. Stay with her and do things together.

Iris

BadMoonRising

It's important to distinguish Mild Cognitive Impairment from Dementia. Many people diagnosed with Mild Cognitive Impairment do NOT progress to Dementia. Ask her if she wants your help. Try to follow her cues...For example, if her mind goes blank when she's searching for the right word, does she want you to help her out by suggesting a word? Or would she prefer you ignore her pause? If she repeats herself, does she want to know that she is repeating herself? Or if she can't find an item, does she want help with that? Respect her wishes. This is going to be an emotional roller coaster ride for both of you. Try to take it one day at a time. Oh, and try to set aside some time for the two of you to go on a trip together or engage in an activity that perhaps the two of you never got around to doing.