Mom thinks people are stealing her eyeglasses - is this a delusion, paranoia, or just regular alz??

SiberianIris

My 95 year old mother was diagnosed with alz last July. I'd say she's in stage 4. She lives in a CCRC and now has a daily companion for supervision. We told her this person is her "driver", because she doesn't think she needs help with anything else. Other people regularly come by for medication management, OT, etc. (I have another thread on here about driving. That seems to have been put to rest...at least for now 🤞)

She thinks everyone is "very nice", but is adamant they are stealing her eyeglasses. I'm sure they are not, but now I know better than to tell Mom otherwise.

I'll look around her apartment and can usually find several pairs without much trouble.

She can forget so many things, but this is one thing she keeps bringing up constantly.

Does anyone have a solution? The only medications she takes are Lexapro for anxiety and eye drops for her glaucoma. Would a higher dose of Lexapro help or some other medication?

I don't want her feeling like people are stealing from her, because she NEEDS these people, and I want her to be able to trust them.

Thanks!

Lane Simonian

The belief that someone is stealing an item is a common delusion for Alzheimer's disease patients.

My mother stopped having this delusion after we starting using aromatherapy (direct inhalation of essential oils such as rosemary, bay laurel, and orange) for a few seconds each morning under each nostril. There are some studies suggesting that certain essential oils can reduce anxiety in dementia patients, but I have not seen any for delusions, but it may work for others as well.

https://www.news-medical.net/health/Aromatherapy-for-Dementia.aspx#:~:text=A%20study%20has%20found%20that,symptoms%20in%20patients%20with%20dementia.

pookabera

We never had any issues with my dad losing things are having this specific delusion/paranoia because by the time his dementia was moderately progressed he'd also become bedbound.

That being said - something that I've found really valuable while reading up on dementia caregiving is that the more we can balance validating and working around the delusions/confusion the better it is for our loved one.

"Validating" as in: why does she think someone is stealing her glasses? She may have been the type of person who always had her things "just so" and her glasses are important to her - in her mind, things may still be that way. Which means the chance that just set them somewhere and forgot wouldn't make sense to her. I think that the feelings of confusion and disorientation that people with dementia experience lend themselves toward being distrusting of the people around them.

I'm not sure how big the space is that she's living in - but could it be practicable for the companion to do a sweep of her room (when possible to do it without her knowing) to put her glasses back where she expects them to be?

housefinch

It sounds like she may need a more supportive living situation than her current one and maybe a medication evaluation if a more supportive setting doesn’t calm her. And a UA but I would suspect she has progressed, as what you’re describing is very common in moderate to severe dementia. Sounds like she needs 24/7 eyes on her—memory care. If she is alone at night, even in an assisted living facility, she sounds unsafe to handle an emergency. Best wishes.

harshedbuzz

What part of the CCRC does she reside in currently?

If she's in an apartment/cottage this is likely paranoia/delusion. It could be she's hiding things for safekeeping and forgetting where. Or it could just be she's paranoid/suspicious. Medication can help with this. IME, paranoia and delusion call for a bigger gun than Lexapro. She may need a low dose of something like Seroquel to help with this.

If she lives in a MC unit within a CCRC, it could be other residents are shopping her room. This is very common in MCFs. If this is happening, it's best to label everything so it can be returned when confiscated by staff.

HB

Emily 123

My mom uses the inexpensive reading glasses you can buy online. I bought her another three pack because she squirrels things away. That seems to have worked for now.

SiberianIris

Thanks for the responses everyone! They are very helpful.

Mom is in an assisted living apartment. I can usually find the missing glasses, and the places they're in are not highly unusual, but I do think she's hiding them from herself.

One really surprising development, since I didn't think something like this was possible for someone with alz, is that she's recently started keeping her apartment keys in a little clear pouch. Now she can quickly find them in her pocketbook without spending untold time digging for them - something she's pretty much done my entire life. I don't know how long this will last, but it's a nice win for us both. ❤️

sunnydove

Oh I do NOT miss the "who stole my...." phase! I'd hear stories about people coming into the house and stealing the paintings off the wall (they were still there) or that they stole furniture. There was one time Mom asked me where I put her boots. I had no idea what she was talking about so I asked her what boots? She said she couldn't find her yellow boots with the fur. Oh, you mean your GO-GO boots? I have no idea if she ever had boots like that at all, but certainly not in the last 50 years! I eventually figured out that if I just said something like, "oh, I think I saw those somewhere. I'll keep my eyes peeled!" or "let's have a snack and then we will go look for them" that it reduced the anxiety of thinking they were stolen enough that she could relax and usually that allowed her to forget that she was looking for them as well. Rest assured this is a common phase and will eventually pass.