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How to educate someone to help with PWD

M5M
M5M Member Posts: 118
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I have a neighbor who has expressed willingness to be a helper/friend to DH. He is retired, nearby, pleasant. Although he has a willing spirit, he has no experience with PWD. Surely there are some easy-to-read pamphlets, etc that will introduce a novice to the overall situation. I don't think my friend wants to know the whole dirty story at this point, so it doesn't need to be as specific as we get on here….suggestions?

Comments

  • Phoenix1966
    Phoenix1966 Member Posts: 209
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    Have you thought about inviting him over for lunch with you and your DH?

  • M1
    M1 Member Posts: 6,788
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    Maybe give him the link to "understanding the dementia experience"? Pretty short read. I know the link is in the group for new members

  • M5M
    M5M Member Posts: 118
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    That's what we are working toward, but DH is resistant to a "caregiver" arrangement, so I'm trying to create just some random encounters. We have the time to get it started, and need to arrange some more time for the two of them.

  • SSHarkey
    SSHarkey Member Posts: 298
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    I think the lunch idea is good. Of coming over to help you… That’s how I got my mother started with a caregiver. Under the pretext of “my friend is coming over to keep me company “. Worked great. Once your DH feels comfortable with him and enjoys the idea of another guy to talk to, he’ll buy in. Especially if the helper will do things your DH enjoys.

  • Jeannielou
    Jeannielou Member Posts: 28
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    I would invite him over for visits and gradually he will catch on. Maybe after a few visits run to the store for about half an hour and gradually increase the time. I think it will be a great experience for both of them and you.

  • concerned_sister
    concerned_sister Member Posts: 425
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    There are short you tube videos. There's a set I really like with a woman acting out both roles of PWD and caregiver, with do's and don'ts. Here's one:

    https://www.youtube.com/shorts/MPzFHUA5bwg

  • FTDCaregiver1
    FTDCaregiver1 Member Posts: 111
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    Like the lunch idea and sharing info combo too, good way to gently immerse in your world.

  • M5M
    M5M Member Posts: 118
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    Thanks for the good suggestions. The video is a new one I'd not seen. We have had one brief encounter and DH warmed to the new acquaintance. We'll see how things develop! I believe this man could be helpful to let me have at least an hour or so each week, and then make it easier to introduce an actual care aide as we need that.

  • jfkoc
    jfkoc Member Posts: 3,902
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    Just never let on that the person coming in is there for your husband….

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
Read more