So Sad!

NUMber2

My LO will soon be moving into her new space in AL. She's finally back in her own neck of the woods in SC and she's so much more content. It hurts me that she's so much happier with the sunshine and warmth than she ever was doing things with me in WI. I bent over backwards to try to make her happy while she was in WI, which killed me and our relationship. She never wanted to move by me, she just didn't want to hurt my feelings. I love her for trying but it was all in vain. She told a friend that life disappoints her so much. I'm guessing that she thought things would be as they would have been if she had moved by us in 1994. Even though things have obviously changed, kids have grown etc., she saw them every month and she saw me 3 days a week and sometimes more. We went out to eat, went shopping, doctors appointments, my house just to sit, we watched movies, we "talked" and celebrated every holiday together. She could hardly walk so it made getting around very difficult!! She fought me all of the time and I fought back. She cried and complained almost everyday. I went insane and my kids really didn't enjoy being with her anymore. It truly was a nightmare. So, I'm so happy for her that she's finally back in SC but I'm sad that I'll be leaving her soon because I know it won't be long until she leaves me and i won't be here. 😢 She never wanted to die "alone", but that's exactly what's going to happen. Thanks for letting me share my ups and down these past 8 months!

After rereading this post, i realize, i shouldn't be sad. This is a chance to help our relationship heal. I'll be back to SC in a few months. When I do visit from now on, I hope we are able to create happy memories that will last a lifetime! ❤️ (got to find hope)

psg712

You have done everything you can to get her to a place of peace and safety. Give yourself some grace to recover from these difficult months. Yes, you can hope for good visits in future, once she is settled in and you are rested. W

NUMber2

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/206209#Comment_206209

That thought brings a smile to my face! Thank you!!

Anonymousjpl123

You absolutely did everything you could. You moving her to close to you to showed her you would, and you both tried. That will take away any of the “what if we had”s. Now, she can settle in and you can visit and be a loved one. The difference in visits with my mom now that she’s settled are night and day. You will have this. There’s a woman where my mom lives who has one daughter close and one who visits from 3,000 miles away a few times a year for a week and it’s clear having both of them in her life matters. I hope YOU can now get some rest, heal, and then spend a different kind of time with your mom.