Rough times

opksguy

I’m a newcomer to this. My DW is in mid stage dementia, starting last October and is aggressively getting worse. Being the caregiver and trying to to work with an elder lawyer is so overwhelming. My DW is only 67, it’s difficult thinking I’ll have to deal with MC placement in the future. 
In the afternoons (I’ll call it sundowners), my DW makes a sudden change from knowning I’m her husband to a stranger trying to take her house, cars and money. (We’ve been married 47 years, everything is jointly owned). I can’t calm her down and usually have my son talk to her to try to calm her. Sometimes it works other times it doesn’t.

I guess I’m venting, looking for any encouragement or advice for help.

Thanks

M1

Welcome to the forium. Have you talked to her docs about the sundowning? There are medications that might help, like Seroquel or Risperdal. Might make life easier for both of you.

hiya

please talk to your doctor. Seroquel was a life changer for DH and me!!! DH still does a lot of the same things but in a calmer, less mission driven way. Late afternoon/evenings are now bearable.

ImMaggieMae

Welcome to the forum. Definitely talk to her doctors about medications. They can make a big difference. Everyone reacts differently, so it may take a few tries to find what works best. They also have to be adjusted from time to time, especially in the beginning. They don’t cure anything, but they can certainly make life more manageable.

harshedbuzz

Hi and welcome.

I am sorry for your reason to be here but pleased you found this place.

Behavior is communication. While sundowning is a common phenomenon, it doesn't mean it's easy of the person experiencing it or the LOs caring for them. I'd suggest a geripsych if you can see one reasonably soon, otherwise her PCP or neurologist may be willing to prescribe. Seroquel allowed my mom to keep dad home with her about 18 months longer than she would have been able without the medication.

Teepa Snow has some videos on this topic that include care strategies that may help with this behavior.

https://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=teepa+snow+sundowning+videos&qpvt=teepa+snow+sundowning+videos&FORM=VDRE

HB

midge333

Seroquel is a miracle drug for my DW. I agree with everyone above - call your PCP.

jsps139_

Seroquel has helped the sundowning for my DH also. It still happens daily, but it’s more confusion minus the anxiety and agitation. I hope you can get some meds soon and I hope they help like they have for so many on here.

opksguy

I want to thank everyone for your support and advice. I will definitely follow up Seroquel. I’ll be back for an update. Thanks again.