Catheter

mpang123

My dad, 88, with VD, has an indwelling catheter due to inability to void due to enlarged prostate. He refuses to take meds for enlarged prostate. Lately he's been asking the urologist to discontinue the catheter. He didn't want to wear it for the rest of his life. I understand it is very uncomfortable and painful. He asked for options for alternatives. The urologist said either he has surgery, or cath himself, or just keep it like it is. He decided to just let it be but I'm fearful that he will become more insistent on refusing being catheterized. What if he refuses altogether? He has to be able to void. I'm thinking about telling him that if he cooperates to see the urologist and get his catheter changed every month, I will treat him for lunch or shop for his favorite food on the day of his appointment. He is still food oriented and motivated. I'll see how this goes...

Lynn24

My mother refuses to take meds also. I bought a pill crusher from Amazon, to crush pills, and either put the medication in juice, applesauce or Ensure. This method has worked for over a year.

mpang123

Lynn, my dad is very selective with what he will or won't take. He believed that the Tamsulosin was actually glass. Then he was to take gemtessa, but also refused. However, when he had a bladder scan done as an outpatient, it showed his prostate wasn't enlarged much anymore. So he didn't have to take those meds. But he still couldn't void by himself so he has to wear a catheter. He is also bowel incontinent and is constipated. He was taking miralax but then he stopped taking it. My mom will sneak the powder in his coffee instead and he won't know and is tasteless. At least he's still compliant in taking his thyroid, cholesterol and blood pressure pills.

Lynn24

Yes, it is a battle. My mother used to complain about having a headache everyday last year, but would put Tylenol into her pocket and never take it. This disease is the worst!!!!

M1

mpang, you say "he has to be able to void:" if he refuses to wear the catheter he will die of kidney failure eventually—which is not necessarily a bad way to go, but the pressure of the enlarged bladder would be extremely uncomfortable. So you are probably better off with it like you are. An alternative would be a suprapubic catheter that goes in through the adominal wall and not through the penis, some men tolerate that better, but it is also invasive, obviously. Difficult decision. Have you considered a hospice evaluation for him? It might help your mother and you, too. Don't know whether he would qualify but there is no harm in asking. You don't need a doctor's order, you can just call yourself and ask for an evaluation.

Lynn24

Mpang, I can attest to a hospice evaluation. I admitted my mother into Hospice comfort care services a few months ago, and it has been a tremendous help for our family.

mpang123

The urologist suggested for dad to have home health do his catheter changes at home but I think he'll refuse. He's already having resistance changing it at the clinic. Having an intrusive procedure that requires sedation is a no no. He gets delirium like he did when he had back surgery and can't take narcotics. I need to ask my mom to allow hospice to evaluate him. Right now my mom doesn't mind taking care of him like bathing him, changing him, feeding him, giving him his meds, reminding him to empty his urine bag, check his BP, taking him for walks, etc. I know hospice will do all that but right now my mom is ok doing it. But when she starts having trouble doing it, then hospice will definitely be needed. Things change…

mpang123

As predicted, my dad voiced his opinion about wearing the catheter for the rest of his life. The urologist tried to explain to him that he no longer can void without the catheter and that he can get seriously ill. He came home in a bad mood but I think my mom can distract him with good food to eat. He has a phone visit with his palliative care doctor next week and I'll tell her what's up. I know hospice is a possibility soon.