Dad Going Into Hospice

rhun1320

Condensed Verion

Weve gone through so much concerning my Dad since last summer, but I'm going to try and keep this brief.

My Dad is 70 and was diagnosed with Alzheimer's last summer. He's in memory care now. He refuses his medication (even for high blood pressure and cholesterol) and won't eat. It's not due to lack of appetite, but suspect on contamination. Even the food we bring him, he's suspect of. The frustrating part is he'll request us bring him food, take a bite or two, and then throw it away. He's lost a lot of weight and has become more delusional. Memory care doesn't seem to know what to do for him, so we are going to discuss hospice. I feel like my Dad is suicidal still. He attempted to overdose in January and was in a behavioral health facility before his current memory care unit. Attempting to stabilize him is of no use because he won't take any meds.

Side note: my mom was diagnosed with Ovarian cancer in 2020 (stage 4). She wasdoing very poorly in January but is doing so much better by the grace of God. I think my Dad is trying to die before she does. He actually admitted it

We don't know what else to do.

Not looking for answers, just talking this out.

M1

Hi rhun. Have you thought about giving him liquid medications mixed in drinks or milkshakes? Just a thought...paranoia is a very hard symptom to treat. Hospice evaluation also comes to mind and does sound like a good idea. So difficult for you to have both parents ill simultaneously.

Lynn24

I agree. I had my mother admitted to Hospice comfort care services a few months ago to assist with bathing and hygiene needs, and other services that were much needed.

I use a pill crusher to crush meds and I serve the meds in Ensure, applesauce or juice. This method has worked for my mother who is in mid to late stage dementia, for over a year now.

rhun1320

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/207741#Comment_207741

Hi M1, so that was a thought, but he thinks everything is contaminated so I don't think that would work. We did find out that he had a slight UTI, and the hospital administered him an antibiotic via injection. I wonder olif injection could be an option for some of his medication?

Blessedly, my mom is doing quite well. Praying it stays that way for long term.

rhun1320

Hi Lynn24,

I'm glad pill crushing works for your Mom. My Dad thinks all food and drink is contaminated, so that won't work for him unfortunately.

slfields1

My mom started hospice about a month ago. I was very resistant when it was first suggested because I had misconceptions. The doctor explained that she could be in hospice for years - it wasn’t a death sentence. Now that I’ve experienced it, I wish I had made this decision months ago. The support is unbelievable. I honestly don’t know how I managed before hospice. Mom has started to decline more rapidly. I am so grateful for hospice. I feel like it has benefited me just as much as her. I advise you to try it if your dad qualifies. You can always simply end it if you don’t like it.