Today is a bad day and I just need to talk

Jazzma

My DH is adjusting well to the new MC and they say he is sleeping well. I've visited once in two weeks, and called him most days. He knows who I am and says that he misses me. I'm able to tell him how much I love and miss him too. Until today.

I came down with Covid two days ago and my voice is horrible. I called yesterday and we had a good chat in spite of it. Today he didn't recognize me at all. He was very formal and kept asking what I needed and why I called. It's probably because of my voice, but it's also a harbinger of future conversations at some point. I am so very sad. Also isolated, feeling crappy and lonely.

This sounds a bit whiny to me, but I know you all understand how it is.

tigersmom

Jazzma, so sorry to hear that you are feeling low and that you are sick. DH and I both got Covid last September and we were miserable at the beginning. Have you asked your PCP for a paxlovid prescription? That was really helpful for us, at least initially. (I had rebound; DH did not). I am sure part of your DH’s confusion is the unfamiliarity of your voice. Could his MC set up a FaceTime on a phone or tablet, so he could see you? That would give you a chance to explain what’s happening, and give him a visual frame of reference. I am wishing you a speedy recovery and the return of recognition from your DH. It’s always something with this disease, isn’t it?

M1

So sorry you are ill. Might be best to postpone other phone calls for now—I hardly ever talk to my partner in MC on the phone, it's not clear to me that she understands any phone calls any more. If i can't visit, i just wait until i can be there in person. She doesn't seem to know the difference, because she has no sense of time whatsoever.

It's good that he seems to be adjusting well. Try to remember this all may be harder on you than it is on him.

Hope you have a speedy recovery.

Jgirl57

yikes! I hope you feel better soon!

Arrowhead

I placed my 69-year-old wife in memory care last October. I visit her 5 times a week and she seems to know that she knows me, but she can't communicate at all, so I don't know just what she knows. She will always let me hug her, and sometimes kiss her. She forgot we were married early on, but would remember from time to time. Be grateful that your husband still knows your name and who you are. Someday he might not.

AnderK

So sorry you are ill, but am glad your dh is adjusting well. Thank goodness that he is being cared for so that you xan get the rest you need. My thoughts are with you. Kathy

AnderK

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/209288#Comment_209288

Ps, don't worry about being whiny!

ButterflyWings

One thing about this dementia journey. Whatever’s happening today, just wait a bit and it will change.

I hope you feel better soon and that your DH is less confused when he sees you again. BTW, any slight change in my appearance has thrown my DH off since at least Stage 4. Different hairstyle, even a change of blouse could either help him identify me or convince him a strange person had just sat down beside him (me, returning from another room after stepping away briefly). It never lasted.

He still has periods of recognizing me every day, even in Stage 7. Not by name anymore, but he knows it’s me and that I am his. I’m ok with that though the first time he did not know me, it was a total gut punch so I understand how you feel. I agree that if a FaceTime or Zoom could be set up so he can see your face while your voice is different, that might help.

Try not to worry too much. Just rest, hydrate, and feel better.