Checking in... post-diagnosis frustrations...

MelissaNH

Good Morning Everyone. I so appreciate the posts I've read this morning. It is comforting to know that my feelings are normal. I am feeling so powerless these days. As if the diagnosis isn't enough to deal with, it's dealing with healthcare, insurance, the government and lawyers. It's enough to drive anyone mad. Then add in all the other life stuff that just doesn't seem to want to stop long enough to catch a breath. And my kids. Sigh…

DISABILITY is crawling along. It's been a week since my phone interview, which lasted three hours. I dropped off DH56 medical records at the local office. The online status says the application is at 7%. I'm not sure how long it will take to go to the state for medical review. This process is crazy for people in crisis.

CELA MEETING was $500 for the consultation. I left there feeling like a huge weight had been lifted off of me, but I don't really know why because he didn't really tell me a whole lot. I had a list of questions that apparently no one has ever asked him before. That was disappointing. Anyway… this is what I got from the meeting… for $3000 he will do POAs and an estate plan which will entail putting my house into a revocable trust. I'm not sure why I needed a CELA for this? Maybe it's just me. And I know from reading the posts here that $3000 is reasonable, but with our finances in ruin, it seems like a ton of money for something I should be able to do myself. It's kind of infuriating that we can't do things for ourselves and have to spend all this money when we are in crisis and many of us are in financial ruin due to this disease. I'm sorry. I just had to vent.

Today we go for the PET scan. It's an hour away. I'm very anxious about the results but will be glad to have more information. These rollercoaster of emotions are crazy.

Our health insurance runs out this month. Government Marketplace isn't looking like a very good option for us. I had to use our modest 401K to pay off medical/dental bills from when he lost jobs and we had no health insurance at the beginning of this journey and to pay our $7000 deductible we fulfilled in the past month and to try to keep a roof over our heads until we get disability and I have to claim that as AGI. The lowest plan was $450/month and they don't pay anything until we fill a $17000 deductible. Really? That's insane. Other plans were just as bad. Higher premiums, huge deductibles and co-insurance. Who the heck can afford this when they have no income coming in? It certainly doesn't pay to be responsible with your money these days. Again, I took out the 401K to pay medical bills! I get that it's considered income to them, but seriously, it's not income to live on if it's going directly to healthcare. Things are so messed up. I don't forsee anymore appointments until December when he has his 6-month check with neurology, but being without insurance with this disease is so scary since anything can happen. This is so stressful… I wish so badly we could just go back to work and live our lives again. We worked so hard all these years and… ugh.

I'm sorry for being so negative. I just wish so badly something would go right. It all feels heavy and dark right now and I feel so powerless to save us!

M1

Melissa, I am a compulsive bill payer and hate having debt. But: I would not pay medical bills with your 401K. Let them accumulate I think. Maybe someone with more expertise than I have could comment on this, but I get the impression that medical debt is looked on differently than other debts when it comes to your credit ratings, etc.

trottingalong

I did my own POA for finances and our local hospital did the POA for medical. After I did the POA for finances, a local attorney reviewed it to make sure all was correct, which cost me $300. You do need to make sure you do one specifically for your state. I would also encourage you not to touch your retirement accounts for medical.

harshedbuzz

I agree with the others.

I would not pay off medical debt with retirement funds. I might contact them and see whether you could negotiate a much lower payment and schedule of payments over years or let it all go to collection.

Mom did go with a CELA; I had to realign their investment portfolio and sell cars and houses for them, so I needed something watertight. A boilerplate might not have been accepted— even their banks allowed me complete access including safe deposit boxes. YMMV.

HB

wose

You have so much to deal with Melissa. I am so so sorry. You need some victories and a breather. I paid 5000.00 for all documents and I put our house in an Irrevocable Trust. If it is revocable, anyone has access to it. Our 5 year look back clock started on May 1, so I have to make it 5 years before it’s safe. Hugs for you💜