Have any questions about how to use the community? Check out the Help Discussion.

Mobile phone in MC

In a week, my DW will move to an apartment in MC. I wonder what advice you all have regarding cell phone. She barely uses it any more, because she can not do so safely and effectively, but . . . How will I or her friends reach her?

Comments

  • CindyBum
    CindyBum Member Posts: 270
    250 Care Reactions 100 Likes 100 Comments 25 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member
    edited June 9

    My DW also can't use her cell phone anymore and was always stressed anyway by trying not to lose it.

    I talked to ATT about getting a landline, but the nice guy on customer service recommended I get a Cell2Jack cell phone to home phone adapter and bought a landline phone. It connects the cellphone to the landline phone and that's what she uses now. It seems to be working fine. I didn't have to change the numbers and share that with friends and no different bills for me.

  • ButterflyWings
    ButterflyWings Member Posts: 1,752
    500 Likes Fifth Anniversary 1000 Comments 250 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member
    edited June 9

    If she barely uses it now, I would suggest it is a good time to lose it. Maybe ask MC their advice, but I see a lot of forum mates wishing their DH did not have a phone to stop the texting or calling at inappropriate times (or endlessly), or to limit access to banking or risk of spam calls and getting scammed.

    DH was only in MC for a couple of 10 day respite stays, but I could call the MC any time during waking hours and they would hand him the phone. Maybe they could schedule a regular check in day or time between your visits? Others with LOs in MC will come along with better answers for you.

  • M1
    M1 Member Posts: 6,788
    1,500 Care Reactions 1,500 Likes 5000 Comments 1,000 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    Tyrone only one of 45 residents in our facility has a phone. Her friends will have to visit in person, if at all. I would not recommend taking it and can tell you for a fact that the staff won’t want to fool with it. Some places do have iPads etc. where they can arrange FaceTime for out of towners, but my partner didn’t know what to do with that.

  • SDianeL
    SDianeL Member Posts: 967
    500 Care Reactions 250 Likes 500 Comments 100 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    My husband quickly lost the ability to use a cell phone. I tried a land line phone but he never learned how to use it. The first facility he was in would bring him the phone but the one he's in now doesn't do that. Talk to the facility to see if they have the staff to help with phone calls. If I want updates I call and leave a message for the nurse. She calls me back. I can no longer speak to my DH on a phone.

  • Joe C.
    Joe C. Member Posts: 964
    Fifth Anniversary 500 Comments 100 Care Reactions 100 Likes
    Member

    DW’s MC allows use of their phone system for residents to get phone calls. The way it works is: LOs call the front desk and ask to speak to the residents, the receptionist call down to the aides in the community and they have a cordless phone they bring to the resident and the call is transferred. DW does not use it because she has lost the ability to speak. Some residents that I have observed with their own cell phones are constantly call home so that is something to consider.

  • mrahope
    mrahope Member Posts: 536
    500 Comments Fourth Anniversary 250 Care Reactions 100 Likes
    Member

    I would recommend that you do not bring the phone to memory care. My DH has had anger and agitation which have come through loud and clear in his texts. This was like having the worst aspects of him ONLY. Still, I was reluctant to remove the phone. However, when he managed to access his bank account (which we had 'locked' or so we believed) and transfer funds (fortunately to me and DD) the time had come. He was/would have been too vulnerable to scammers and the funds are needed to pay for his care. I also think he held delusions that he could bribe his way out of MC. YMMV.

  • sandwichone123
    sandwichone123 Member Posts: 767
    500 Comments 100 Insightfuls Reactions 100 Likes Third Anniversary
    Member

    My dh had his phone until recently, when he started calling me between 8 and 40 times a day. I could tell from the voicemail (not him talking but just background noises) that he was even calling while he was interacting with others—kind of just something to do with his hands when he was bored. I just brought the phone home with me a week ago. I don't know if he's asked about it, because it's hard for me to understand what he's trying to communicate, but I think he has not.

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
Read more