Has anyone else experienced this?

Palmetto Peg

My HWD keeps insisting that his clothes are wet. They aren't, although they may feel a little cool to the touch due to the air conditioning. He is putting things in the dryer on high and leaves them in for a long time until they feel dry to him. If I tell him they aren't, he gets very angry and begins shouting that I am lying. Since we are working very hard here to keep things calm, I just let him use the dryer until he is satisfied. Is this a common "dementia thing"? Thanks for much for this and for all of the words of encouragement you have all given me recently!

Jeanne C.

My husband definitely has sensory issues. Cold and wet can feel similar.

OhDear

My husband definitely had that. Every piece of clothing I offered was "wet". I ended up just agreeing with him and putting it myself in the dryer at high for 1-2 minutes. Once he felt it was warm - no problem and the complaints eventually decreased. I looked into towel warmers but decided it wasn't worth it because he accepted my intervention.

Plenty of other problems still…I'm learning that if I just agree and do something small (or pretend!) to address it, it goes away. Frustrating, I know - it helps me to say "Wow, how did that happen? I have no idea!" That gets me "off the hook" and I feel less need to argue.

Deep breath and good luck- I feel your pain!

jfkoc

My only thought, keep your laundry where he can not find it.

jsps139_

My HWD was always telling me … this shirt smells … and he’d go change his shirt multiple times a day because they smelled. I would just take it out if the dirty laundry (knowing it was clean) and hang it back up when he wasn’t looking because what else can we do, right? It is very weird NEVER EVER being able to reason with them. It definitely takes tons and tons of patience! Otherwise arguments galore!

jsps139_

I love it when people post what they actually say …. “Wow, how did that happen? I have no idea!” I use the sayings that I read on here so often. It is so helpful!! Thanks OhDear!

Palmetto Peg

I feel so much better knowing this is fairly common. I have been so stressed with him lately, that I haven't been as agreeable as I could be. Who cares if he puts everything in the dryer? I guess I don't, in the big picture of things. Thanks for the info - we will continue to muddle through. I hope the Seroquel he was just put on helps with this a little. 🙄

ButterflyWings

Yes, the validation technique is really helpful. "Oh my goodness", "OK, we will fix that", etc., even "Huh!" and then redirect subtly to something else. As many times as needed.

The sensory thing is real. DH often says something is "Hot!", when it is actually cold and vice versa. The outside of a glass of juice, his room temperature pureed soup, etc. And he also does experience wet or damp, as cold. (Well it really is technically, once the air hits the skin).

And I know he feels the temperature of urine filling his incontinence brief, (warm), alerting him that he has to go (has actually already done it). But a few seconds later it is wicked away from his skin and he's forgotten the act entirely. Unless he has a leak or overflow, then he gets very chilly — even goosebumps on his arms — even though it is only wetness on the seat of his pants (absorbed somewhat by the chux pad).

He also describes warm, windy weather as "cold" although I don't know if that is just a word retrieval issue or if he actually feels it, temperature-wise, as several degrees cooler than I do. Complex disease.

tigersmom

Peg, when the weather was colder my DH often complained that the shirt I removed from a container in our walk-in closet and handed to him to wear was wet, when it was actually a little cold. He has lots of sensory issues — the water in the shower “hurts,” it is too hot when it is barely warm to me. I am sorry you are dealing with this. Hang in there.