Caregiving Supprt

ClarkEb

I have read many discussions about how care giving has changed things for caregivers. We are moving in that direction. W had one person that came Tue Thur 4-8, but we never made it past 6:00 6:30, due to LO desire to go home or ………. Even with this experienced caregiver distracton redirect would only last 10-15 min. So forging ahead we enlisted Visiting Angels. M/W/F 1-3pm, thinking earlier time might work. So far, we are faced with the similar problem. There is always some reason LO has to go. We have done better getting through the two hours. But, it is still a struggle. We would like to move to longer day and possibly overnight as things progress (wanting to keep LO home as long as possible), but we are still plagued by the desire to go home. It is random during the day, usually satisfied with an errand. Evening is harder and after dinner more difficult. With after she has gone to bed being the most difficult. We have had Random trips as late as 6AM.

The trick to her going home, especilly after bed, is that any attempts to distract redirect or stall dont go very far as her standard reply is “what’s the problem i only live across the street”. Or “ill take my car“. I tried “your car is in for repairs”. Not doing that again. So I agree to drive her car. Kind of hard to defend, so trip it is.

I would very much like to expand the caregiver support. But i am not sure how to overcome this going home. It is about 50/50 some nights wheather she will sleep through the night or not. So i guess i would still be on the hook for making the trips at night and same for the day…. I would like to get away from asking family to be here, they are all working and have to take leave. I would like to ge away, even for a haircut (last one 10/19/19 granddaughters wedding, but i have gotten pretty good pruning things) with out leaving the care giver with the task of dealing with the going home trips. Some have said they will take her in our car, ride with us (no room) or take her in their car. Almost forgot. About once a week i end up with multiple trips as she evokes the “why are we here” or “this is not me house’ clause.

Appologies for rambling. It is just one of things there’s just doesn’t seem to be an answer for.

I would appreciate and thoughts,suggestions.

After several long years of increased duties, i would like to get away even for a little time. If she is engaged with the care giver, i can go out in the yard and pull a few weeds, water something take a short walk in the woods or throw a rock in the creek.