Partner

[Deleted User] · August 25

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terei · August 26

If he is out of control, it is time to call 911 and have him transported to an ER with the intent to then transfer him to a geri psych ward for assessment + treatment.

Explain that he has dementia so if he becomes aggressive, they know what they are dealing with.

jsps139_ · August 26

Have you spoke with his Dr about medication?

If he is taking meds for agitation and aggression, maybe a change in dosage is necessary??

The anger is so hard to deal with when we, as caregivers, do EVERYTHING. They are not capable of expressing gratitude anymore. It’s so hard, but if he gets on the right meds with the dose adjusted as needed, things should get somewhat easier. Hang in there!

Jeanne C. · August 26

I agree - call 911 and have him taken to ER and then a geripsych unit. Until the the agression is managed, he's a danger to you and himself. Please think of it as something you're doing FOR him not to him. Let us know how you are. Please keep safe.

Denise1847 · August 26

Please talk to the doctor re meds. They helped my DH alot.

LaneyG · August 26

That’s what I ended up having to do in your same situation. I was afraid of him. He went to ER. He is now admitted to a med surg bed till a geripsych comes available. The psychiatrists in their behav health unit (they don’t work with dementia) are trying to stabilize him in meantime. Not going so well.

[Deleted User] · August 26

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[Deleted User] · August 26

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Russinator · August 26

I agree - call 911 and have him taken to ER. Please keep safe

midge333 · August 26

I am so sorry you are in this situation. For your safety, you need to call 911 and have him transported to ED. He needs to be admitted to psych ward to get control of his agitation. Until this happens, keep your car keys and cellphone with you at all times. Do you have a safe room you can lock yourself into for protection? Please stay safe.

Jo C. · August 26

I am sorry for what is happening. Your safety is the most important issue. If you continue to do the same things in the same way, NOTHING will change and it can also certainly get worse. From what has been posted, it appears that this is an ongoing mental health issue which needs to be professionally managed.

If you are going to continue as is, you will need a safe place in the house to lock yourself into and your cell phone if he begins to become physically threatening, and it may be that for safety reasons you may have to abruptly and swiftly get out of the house. Do NOT be fearful or embarrassed to contact 911 if things have progressed to a possible danger level, such things can and do happen. Safety is the priority. Also, it is probably a good idea to put together a small suitcase with some clothing and needed meds, credit card, etc. for yourself and keep it in the trunk of the car should you need to make a hurried, "get-a-way." Keep car keys on your person or find a hiding place outside so you can access them should you need to make a swift exit.

Good advice has been given to keep your cell phone with you at all times and know which room in the house has a locking door you can get to if you cannot get out of the house. One can purchase a locking door knob for a room if needed, and they are simple to install. It would be best to keep a car key on your person or in a hiding place outside should you need to suddenly get away from the house for your own safety.

Are you safe while you are sleeping or would he be a danger to you once you are asleep? If a danger, then it is past time to move from the house until the situation is managed. Important to cover the safety issues at hand; severe issues can happen abruptly in a slick second without warning, so best to be prepared and keep sensitively aware of what is happening and avoid the worst outcome.

Any weapons such as handguns, rifles, knives, clubs, etc. should be removed when he cannot see it being done.

I am so very sorry that this is happening and has danger issues that one really needs to stay highly aware of and not ignore while quietly hoping for something better. Your well-being and even life may depend on the plans you make for danger possibilities.

Let us know how you are and what plans you have put together for your own safety; it will be up to you what plans will realistically serve you and your safety best.

Will be thinking of you,

J.