caregiver needs help

CORDERO

My wife has vascular dementia. She is very articulate, very social and very stubborn. She has had several falls resulting in broken hips and vertebrae, but doesn't think she needs help. I have employed a caregiver couple half-days a week. Generally this provide a nasty response each time the person arrives. Regularly she is quite verbally combative. I need a professional to talk to for my sanity and health. I would like to find a psychologist who has experience in this field. If they accept phone appointments, location would not be an issue. Anyone have suggestions.

SDianeL

you might try the Alzheimer’s helpline: 800-272-3900. Also read the book “The 36 Hour Day” which helped me after my husband’s diagnosis. Have you tried telling her that the help is for you? That worked for me. Also if she’s agitated call her doctor and get a referral to a Geriatric Psychiatrist to prescribe medications that may calm her.

Iris L.

Read about anosognosia. This will explain why your DW doesn't think she needs help. She won't. Don't keep telling her that she needs help. Read a lot of threads and learn the work-arounds that the members use, especially in regards to caregivers coming in. Don't expect her cooperation.

Iris

Pat6177

you could ask your PCP for a referral. There are online services that gather info from you to find you an online therapist but I’ve never talked with anyone that has used these services. At a minimum, I think ALZ Assoc would be able to point you toward a support group. That might help and might also provide referrals for a one on one therapist.

LaneyG

I was really fortunate. My PCP strongly recommended a referral to a behavioral health org associated with their practice. No idea of the referral mentioned my husbands dementia but l landed with someone who was experienced and knowledgeable about dementia care in addition to all of my related or unrelated issues. We zoom meet once a month. I have found that to be enough for me but she has offered more visits if I felt the need. I recommend going through your PCP. They should be able to refer you to somewhere.