Broken tooth and dentist

Anna2022

I've discovered that my DH has a broken tooth and he is digging into his mouth, thinking he's got something stuck between his teeth. He refuses to go to the dentist. What can I do???

M1

No one seems to have an answer for you. You probably need to find a dentist who specializes in dementia and/or is willing to sedate him to pull it, and take him without telling him where you’re going. I can’t see any other way….

White Crane

Like M1 said, don't tell him where you're going. Talk to the dentist ahead of time to make sure he or she has treated dementia patients before. I had to do this a couple of years ago when DH had a broken tooth. He didn't refuse to go to the dentist but at that time he could be really insulting to any medical doctor. He asked one dentist if she was a veterinarian. The dentist I took him to had experience in treating dementia patients and was very kind and gentle with him. I hope you find someone to help him.

Anna2022

Thank you. I know there is no good answer but I so very appreciate you, @M1 and @White Crane for virtually holding my hand. I've been up for awhile am trying to find a dementia-friendly dentist, googling and asking for referrals from his geri-psych and my own dentist. They open for business in a few hours.

White Crane

Anna, I hope you can find the help you need to get your husband’s tooth taken care of.

Anna2022

Thank you @White Crane! This disease sucks. We got into see my dentist but the appointment did not go well, I barely got him there. He was angry, argumentative and non cooperative. The dentist tried but could not convince him that it was a broken tooth, repeating the information calmly and showing photos - DH disagreed with everything she said, out loud and in a mean, angry way and refused to look at the photos (this is odd?)... In the end, she said the best thing would be to leave the tooth, and hope that he stops digging at it (so, no help there). The only other thing she suggested was to pull it (requiring another appointment, meds before appt, IV sedation, a different oral surgeon, etc) - that will not happen. He will never go again. As we all know, dementia, fear and anxiety are a toxic mix. The office says they deal with dementia patients (they were doing a fundraising drive for ALZ!) and all were very kind and patient but when she said, has he always been this angry, I thought they haven’t really seen this version of dementia yet. I am trying to get in touch with his geri-psych doc for anxiety meds, as needed and long term - he keeps digging as his tooth and I'm fearing more damage and infection. Yet another losing battle there too - everyone is so dang busy!!

I know his behavior is totally based in fear and anxiety. He’s always been loving and kind to me and women in general. And always a gentleman. I hope some of that will remain in tact as we move forward… .