Struggling with mom in NH

julieanne2024

Mom has been in NH for over a year and has quickly become aggressive, more disrespectful then normal, talking continuously without taking a breath, hitting her call light 12 times in 4 hours for nothing important, obsessing over Money and wants to purchase hundreds of dollars of stuff she doesn’t need. Calls me names and tells me to get out and go home…calls me 12 times a night and the stories she tells me are out of this world, telling me that my dads employer from 50 years ago owes him a $20k life insurance policy, and I am exhausted and don’t know how to adjust to mom? I understand this is the disease but it’s still my mom and I am exhausted!

M1

Welcome to the forum.one thing is to take the phone away. The staff can help her place a call if really needed. Is she on medication for anxiety and paranoia? The atypical antipsychotics like Seroquel and Risperdal can be very helpful, you should discuss with her docs.

NizhoniGrrl

You should definitely block her calls at night. I wouldn’t allow her a phone at this point. You need your rest and peace and nothing you tell her will be enough and the facility will contact you if there is an emergency. Please save your own sanity.

​fesk

You mentioned this happened quickly. If not done already, please rule out any medical issues - urinalysis, blood work, etc. or any other reason for the change. Is there anyone new at the NH dealing with her, any major changes? If there is no apparent or medical reason for the change in behavior, then I would look to see if there's a medication that can help her.

Jo C.

I agree. Please take Fesk's advice and have full labs on both blood and urine done to rule out any onset reasons for the changes. Such changes can be caused by simple urinary tract infections, other subtle infections, dehydration, anemia and SO much more. A complete lab workup would be warranted and then go from there depending on results or lack of results..

Let us know how it is going, so hope that there will be an easy answer and treatment for the changes.

J.