Might be losing my husband’s placement

clarinetist

my husband’s been in Geri-psych for about a week after his latest aggressive incident.The nurse at his memory care came to visit him today and told the social worker they may not take him back. I can’t really blame the memory care.

The social worker told me he would be very challenging to place because he’s had 7 aggressive/violent incidents in spite of multiple Geri-psych visits and med adjustments. I live in a one-bedroom condo; not much room for a home health aide. My DH is much bigger than me and I’m not sure I can physically do his activities of daily living by myself, not to mention the threat of violence.

The Geri-psych staff seem reluctant to give him enough medication to keep him sedated most of the time. I understand why they don’t want to (and I don’t want to), but I’m not sure there’s any other choice.

SDianeL

I’m so sorry. My husband had to be heavily medicated. He would wake up to eat then go back to sleep. Hope they find the right meds.

mzwolcott

My DH is 65. Been living at home with me for 6 years. We had a wonderful caregiver but only qualified for 17 hours a week with Medicaid.

He has been in AFH for almost 6 weeks, just got 30 day notice to vacate due to angry episodes of swearing and threatening staff and residents.

We are looking for another facility willing to take him.

I see the meds, Seroquel, making his eyes half mast and forgetting how to shake someone's hand. But if sedation makes him safe, that's how it will be.

M1

Clarinetist, you must not let the geri psych facility pressure you into taking him home. It is incumbent on them to adequately treat and place him. If he has to be asleep for that to happen, so be it. I am so so sorry.

clarinetist

Thanks for all your comments-i so appreciate your support! I will keep pressing for adequate sedation and a placement other than home.

clarinetist

Update: my DH had some sort of stroke like episode on Saturday where he was leaning heavily to the left and drooling out if the left side of his mouth. Went back and forth on whether to bring him in, as he improved slightly over the course of the day and wasn’t sure the ER could do much for him. Yesterday I decided to send him to the ER for a CT scan because I was concerned his medications might have contributed to the episode and in case we needed a diagnosis for rehab. The CT scan didn’t show anything and over the course of the day his symptoms abated.

During the work up, however, they found he has a little aspiration pneumonia so they started antibiotics and he will be admitted. My DH had his typical reaction to spending time in the ER, and got very agitated. He tried to punch me (luckily I’m quick), and sent my glasses flying. It’s amazing how strong they can be in the midst of agitation.

Hopefully his pneumonia will resolve soon and he can go back to the Geri-psych today.

M1

I bet it was medication but if so it might recur....ugh what a mess, im sure you're exhausted