My DW not eating

Rvk

My DW had a fall in the summer, with nothing but a small bruise. Then a kidney stone 2 months ago, resolved. Then, 2 weeks ago, she fell at home. 2 fractures in her pelvis (no surgery), Brain bleed with no lasting effects, large bruise in her abdomen. Admitted to ICU in a LOT of pain. She is now in a wonderful rehab and doing the work they ask. It's great to see! But she's not eating. Maybe 8 spoons of her favorite soup as I watch and ignores my prompts. She refuses her favorite grilled cheese but will take a "milkshake" of something like ensure and drink it all immediately. From what I've seen in other dialogues here, I'm not very hopeful that this is likely to improve and welcome any suggestions.

M1

So sorry, it's hard to watch. What are your plans after rehab? Is it time to ask for a hospice evaluation?

Mama’sGirl

Hi, ask her if her gums are sore. My mother is like that when her gums are sore.

Rvk

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/226555#Comment_226555

To date there are no plans after rehab. Waiting for the Care Plan Meeting next week to shape that. But, I have not thought about asking for a hospice evaluation until this chat. I likely will. thx

​fesk

In addition to teeth and gums, I'd check to see if there's any type of medical problem (you mentioned large bruise on stomach). You may also want to have a swallow study done to see if there is a reason she is denying thin liquids and foods that need to be chewed but finishing up a milkshake consistency drink right away.

Rvk

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/226564#Comment_226564

thank you for these suggestions. They speech therapist at the rehab facility did a swallow study when she was admitted and said that her swallowing was great.

Rvk

Rvk

As an update, my DW completed rehab in one excellent facility and has transferred for continuing rehab at another wonderful facility. Been here now 5 days, all single rooms. This morning the staff found her naked and in another resident's room. Maybe triggered by a changed and unfamiliar environment. But the nudity is a concern. I'd welcome any thoughts

housefinch

Unless the staff think she has delirium caused by a clear trigger, I would not assume she didn’t get lasting effects from that brain bleed. I would ask yourself what goals you have for her remaining time on earth. Forgive my frankness here. No one with a brain bleed, much less a dementia patient, escapes with zero brain injury. I am biased because I feel that minimizing medical interventions and allowing someone to be comfortable are the right goals at this point. I would be getting a hospice consult and not getting any more medical care except inpatient hospice for pain management if she has another catastrophic fall with pain that can’t be managed with oral medicine. They can check her for a UTI but my hunch is that progression is what caused this behavior. Hospice consult and likely either skilled nursing facility or memory care if her medical needs are manageable there. I would strongly consider asking to speak in person with the physician in charge there and get a very honest unflinching opinion about her condition.

antonmo

Not eating is very dangerous. Do your outmost (but never try to force her) try make her more comfortable, and in better mood, reason with her if she understands the severity of the situation, offer her anything she might like, even a little is a start. She likes milkshake? Great give her more of that until she feels to try something else. Give her and try lot of different options/choices

NizhoniGrrl

People choose to stop eating because they (in mind or body) are getting ready to go. There is no sense in making them eat or worrying about it. Their bodies are going to continue to fail, their minds are going to continue to fail, you can’t change this. You can drag it out, but why make them suffer longer than nature’s course. Follow her lead. Offer food, but don’t force it.

valerieorr

we found out my mil has a large sore spot on her palate and some bad teeth that appears to be the major cause of her not eating. she is getting medication for the sore; haven't heard from the dentist if they feel it would be best to remove them at her age of almost 87 and in frail health. she has a denture on top that she wouldn't allow us to remove when she was at home and she wouldn't take out. we told her sisters but they never took her to a dentist, regardless to the number of times we let them know. she would rarely allow us to do anything for her.

CoryT

My mother's recovery on hospice improved significantly when she began eating her favorite foods. Before that she hardly ate anything and had a g-tube placed.