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Giving up on life?

mabelgirl
mabelgirl Member Posts: 228
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My mom has started to not want to get out of bed except to use bathroom. She’s been losing weight because she’s not eating her meals and only eats small portions. I’m of the opinion to not force her to do anything she doesn’t willing want to do. If I can gently get her to do something I certainly will , but she’s always been strong willed. I feel as if she has given up on living. I’ve even asked her and she cries in response. She’s healthy aside from the dementia. I have a call in to pcp to discuss depression meds. I’m not a harsh person, however since there is no getting better is this a point where hospice should be brought in?

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  • Quilting brings calm
    Quilting brings calm Member Posts: 2,475
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    yes, bring hospice in. If she’s only getting out of bed to use the restroom, she’s not doing most of her activities of daily living.

    Mom is on hospice and she’s spending a lot of time in bed. She’s not eating much either. Not enough to sustain her according to hospice. Hospice added anti anxiety meds to her medication list.

  • housefinch
    housefinch Member Posts: 394
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    It’s important to remember that people with dementia aren’t healthy. They have a terminal brain disease, and your brain controls your breathing, your heart function, etc. Maybe a person with dementia doesn’t have other medical problems like heart disease, high blood pressure, etc—-but they shouldn’t be considered healthy just because they lack those other issues.

  • housefinch
    housefinch Member Posts: 394
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    edited November 16

    I’m sorry-I’m sure my post sounded really harsh. I mean that the brain disease really affects so many areas of health. It’s possible that her stopping getting out of bed is depression, or progression of the disease. That’s why at least getting a hospice consult might be useful. Our PWD went from walking, hoisting his walker over furniture and even his head, to bedridden in 3 days because of an infection. His cognitive status was about stage 6 at that time. He has refused to get out of bed for the 6 months he’s been on hospice.

  • mabelgirl
    mabelgirl Member Posts: 228
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    I didn’t take it harsh just factual that overall she’s not healthy because of the dementia and I get that. She was physically capable prior to taking to her bed. Now though she is getting more physically disabled. I plan to meet with her care team tomorrow to discuss bringing in hospice.

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
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