Three Years in Memory Care

Joe C.

Today marks 3 years since I placed DW in Memory Care. I have been blessed as DW acclimated immediately to MC & has been happy and well cared for there. This morning I made her blueberry pancakes and brought them to her for breakfast. At this point she needs to be hand fed and no longer communicates but since she cleaned the plate I sure she enjoyed them. I once again came home to an empty house and still miss her everyday. The long journey continues.😒

Biggles

oh how my heart goes out to you. I’m sitting in our garden just finished breakfast with puppy at my feet and pigeons in the garden with my DH fallen asleep again in the chair. My heart is breaking and I am silently crying. I don’t want to face MC and appreciate hearing your trials. Blueberry pancakes sound amazing and so special, your DW must have enjoyed them and knowing you were there to care.

Beachfan

Wow, Joe! We are kindred spirits where MCI placement dates are concerned. I had almost forgotten that three years have passed since both you and I placed our loved ones in Nov., 2021. Although DH is gone now, like you, I still come home to an empty house and I miss him everyday. Today, I returned home from a 5 day visit with my son and his family in Texas, something I couldn’t do all the while I was caring for DH. I so appreciate the freedom I have now, but all during the long flight home and the drive from the airport, I was bombarded with the memories of past trips with DH. It hurt and I was sad. It gets better, but it will never be the same. Stay strong.

Joe C.

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/228353#Comment_228353

Beachfan, I remember oh so well how we were both struggling with our decisions leading up to placement. I always think of you when as this time of year approaches. Wishing you all the best this coming holiday season.

DWTired

My heart goes out to you as well… I pray I do the have to place in MC. It’s such a hard journey we all are on..

Sweetwater

White Crane

Three years! I remember when both you and Beachfan placed your dear ones. Time has a way of slipping through my fingers. My DH will have been in MC for one year on January 23rd of next year. Coming up on one year seems surreal. Like both of you, I miss him every day. I can't say it gets easier but it does get more tolerable. Crying still comes easily. My heart goes out to both of you.

Brenda

LindaLouise

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/228353#Comment_228353

I placed my DH in May and just took a 5 day trip to Arizona to see my two grandkids. I've done this trip regularly with my DH and this was my first time alone - I was stunned by how sad I was and how very lonely the flight/drive felt without him! I could almost hear his voice as I traveled the familiar route without him, remembering his helping me with my suitcase, checking out the rental car. Now, it was just me. I was thrilled to see my son/DIL and grands, but felt like I was missing my DH in a new way. It helps to know I'm not the only one feeling this way!

JoseyWales

Three years. Time goes so fast. I think you and Beachfan were the 2 who started off a bunch of placements 3 years ago. I'm just 3 months shy of 3 years since placement.

I'm glad your wife enjoyed the blueberry pancakes. How sweet of you to bring those for her.

jfkoc

thanks for the updates

clarinetist

Joe, am glad your wife has adjusted well to memory care. It’s still so hard watching them progress as you continue your lonely vigil. ❤️

mrahope

Just letting you know that, I, too, feel that "coming home to an empty house" sadness. No matter how terrible our last days before MC were, it's still a shock to the system.

Crushed

We just hit 7 years DW is on hospice

Carl46

My wife doesn't much like blueberries but she wanted to buy blueberry muffins when we were at the market the other day. It took me a while to realize they were primarily a gift for me, the resident blueberry lover. I will miss her greatly when she leaves.

Joe C.

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/228881#Comment_228881

Chushed, That is certainly a long haul.

Crushed

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/228925#Comment_228925

She was at home for 7 years before MC. stage 7 for 4 years now.