Holidays without him.
Last year 11/23/23 was the last holiday I spent with my DH Lonny. I have no pictures of that day. Shortly thereafter I was diagnosed with aggressive cancer & had no choice but to place him immediately in Memory Care. He spent Christmas alone there. It broke my heart in two. He passed August 12th and I am dreading the holidays but I don't want to spoil them for my family. Thanks for being there these last few years. Your information and support helped me more than you will ever know. Love you all. 💜
Comments
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🥰🥰Carrying on in Stage 8. With time, the pain eases; it never goes away.
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Facing my first Thanksgiving without my DH in over forty years. stage 8 is very hard. Sending hugs to all in this sad club.
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Thanksgiving was always our main holiday. Even though it was just the two of us, we celebrated it with joy. As a career postal service employee, Christmas held no charm for him, and we tended to mostly ignore it.
DH went straight from rehab to AL and entered hospice care the day before Thanksgiving last year. He was too weak and ill to celebrate. We were mostly numb.
This year he is in a cycle of declining and rallying, over and over. I will see him for a couple of hours tomorrow. He will have no idea it is Thanksgiving. I will bring a peanut butter & jelly sandwich for myself. They will try to serve him inedible puree.
I will return home to an empty house.
My heart is hurting so badly that I couldn't even make it through this evening's Mass of Thanksgiving without crying. I am having a hard time finding gratitude in my grief.
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so sorry. Sending hugs. 🙏❤️
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… this loss is so heartbreaking, can’t really be put into words. I’m not there yet, but… . I just know how strong you all are to get as far you have , and so for right now, there’s no more gas in the tank, but down the road there will be- hang in there, sending you all love and hugs!💕
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Last Thanksgiving was our last holiday where we celebrated together. We were at my sister’s house and surrounded by family. He engaged with people and seemed to really enjoy himself. By Christmas it was too much for him. He became overwhelmed and I took him home after 20 minutes. He has progressed so much in a year. I spent the morning with him at his memory care facility. He engaged with me in small ways (holding hands, playing with the buttons on my sweater). But he’s not oriented to time or place anymore. I went to my sister’s alone. It was a nice day but I couldn’t help remembering last year (and so many years before, like the thanksgiving the week after I had my gallbladder removed and he spent the day fussing over me and making the world’s smallest turkey).
Holidays are hard. I know you’re missing your Lonny. Sending you comfort.
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Sending all of you virtual hugs. 🙏🏻❤️
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Hugs and prayers to all. I to find the Holidays to be emotionally exhausting and a roller coaster of emotions. My DH is still with us however he lives in his own world. I am so grateful to all of you and this forum.
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Sending hugs. My heart hurts for you and for all of us on this sad journey.
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Commonly Used Abbreviations
DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
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