Dad with early stage, worsening

wordsmith1

Hi,

My sweet dad, 84, is declining and he knows it. It’s utterly heartbreaking. He has begun saying he lives in another house that is exactly like his. Most days, he falls asleep in his chair in the afternoon. I also have to make sure he eats because he won’t think to or he gets overwhelmed thinking about it.

Until one day ago, he was ok to live on his own. I’m there everyday. But his confusion is the dealbreaker. Now I have to decide if I move in with him, or bring him to our house. Reading about AL and alz patients scares the life out of me.

Thanks for kind and helpful words. If you want to tell me I’m wrong about his living alone up til now, don’t waste your energy. I’ve been flamed for allowing this. Bottom line: it’s not helpful to dump your emotions on anyone. I haven’t posted here for more than a year because of this very thing.

SusanB-dil

Hi wordsmith - So sorry you are dealing with 'this'.

MIL is the same about eating, some days she will fixate on it, and other days, we need to make sure she eats at all. Do think twice about taking him on full-time yourself, though. You are right - it is scary, because it is so hard, both physically and emotionally. Could you maybe look into adult daycare through the day, or a daytime caregiver and then stay with him at night - either at his house or yours? this is just a thought because it would give you some extra help.

psg712

Living in a house like his ... I remember my mom saying similar things. When I brought her to my house, she asked me repeatedly whose house it was and then didn't believe me when I told her that I lived there. She said it looked just like the house that "those other people used to live in." It's exhausting and sad. I wish the best for you and your dad.