Need advice and direction

jewel74

my mom was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer’s two years ago. In June the doctor gave a prognosis of 6 to 9 months. At this point mom walks with greater difficulty, is partially urine incontinent and in pull ups full time and I am assisting with shower temp, dressing, food prep, cutting food, etc. her sentences are making less sense and she has started doing this thing where she hovers her finger above her chest and makes small loop type motions down to her stomach and says I got it.
The part that socked me in my gut is even though mom knows who I am, I walked in the room and she said oh yeah you’re the manager. It was as though she forgot me for just a minute. I had been a caregiver for years with training in Alzheimer’s, but with mom it’s different because of the relationship.

What should I be expecting? I’m sorry but I feel frozen and lost.

JulietteBee

I have no words of advice. I just wanted to send you a virtual hug. Though I've seen my mom's decline over the past 5-6 years, she was just diagnosed in Nov 2024. Having my mom forget me even for a moment would destroy me. I'm sorry it happened to you, but as an RN, sadly, I am aware that we both will have to deal with that issue more and more as our mothers slowly lose their memories. Here is that hug! 🫂

SusanB-dil

Hi Jewel - so sorry that happened. Yes, it hurts a lot when our LO no longer recognizes us.

Unfortunately, we never know quite what to expect next. Except the usual trajectory of 'this', but the timeline can vary among all our LOs. If you've met one person with dementia, you've met one person with dementia.

My mom thinks I am her younger sister, most likely due to family resemblance. MIL has no idea. MIL knows that I am not DH first wife, who died of cancer, so then I get: 'who the heck are you'? She can be downright nasty. Mother and I were never close, but she's nicer to me now that I'm her 'sister'. go figure

agree - here: ((HUGS))

psg712

It's hard. My mom reacts with recognition when I visit, but she can't say my name. She has told people a few times that I am her mother. As long as that means she feels loved and protected, I'm good with it. She also thinks my young son is her younger brother.

cdgbdr

My DH "lost" being married. So, he knows I'm his wife and really loves/likes me but just didn't know he was married. Why didn't someone tell him? Also an RN.

jewel74

I appreciate your comments. It does help to know I’m not alone.