Difficult for him but a bit of "light" for me - SSDI approved

CarolinaWren

My husband had two appts for SSDI a couple of weeks ago. He hasn't worked for two years, and financially I am struggling. On a side note, I didn't know initially that I could apply for my 15 yr old son as well. I guess I should do that now.

I was worried about those two appts because his neurologist has never said "I think you have XYZ" It's only in the follow up notes that I get. I asked the SS contact what they would say to him during those appts. I told her I didn't think or didn't know if he was aware of his condition. She was super nice, but also asked "Is he like in denial?" Fast forward the primary care doc that was doing the SSDI exam ending up calling me back with them, and it was so uncomfortable and sad. He had told her he did all kinds of things like cooking, cleaning, showering, etc which he doesn't do. She asked all those questions of me in front of him. I contradicted some of his answers and skirted around others. Why do they put us in these situations? Then she flat out asked him if there was a history of dementia or alzheimers in his family.

He was uneasy for a good week after that appointment, and we have not discussed it.

He also had that 3 hr appt with all of the apptitude tests. He said it was exhausting.

He was approved last week.

Any advice on if I should discuss it with him? I planned on telling him it was approved and it will help with the bills. I got a VM from SS, and they he is approved but they need to discuss with him first. Financially it's a relief for me, but………

SDianeL

do you have a DPOA? If so show it to them. If not you should get with an attorney and get one. I wouldn’t discuss with him. He will hear it from them. Ask if you can be on his he call or put phone on speaker.

trottingalong

do not discuss it with him, it serves no purpose.

Carl46

I suggest you respond to the VM by applying to be his representative payee for SS benefits. That would mean the checks would come in your name to manage for him, and you would deal with the questions. He needs your help on this, and more so in the future.

White Crane

Carl is correct. You will need to apply to be his representative payee. This involves a rather long phone interview. Social Security does not accept DPOA.

CarolinaWren

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/233671#Comment_233671

I just saw a lawyer this week. It was super helpful. DPOA is next on the list. Thank you for the reply

CarolinaWren

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/233675#Comment_233675

I just spoke to them today after he did. After thinking about the call, I think I am his representative payee but not positive. She was super helpful and is sending a letter approving it for my children. I will get back pay for my 18 yr old who was still 17 during this time.

Thank you!

Carl46

You are very welcome.