Dad has moderate alzheimers

brit801wvc

I knew he been off but I scheduled an assessment w his doctor and he was so mad when I told the doc about his sun downing; hallucinations; aggression; and now he won’t do his blood work or brain scan before we can go see his neurologist to confirm where he’s at w Alzheimer’s but where would I even start as far as getting an in home nurse or a memory care nursing home? I’m lost and mentally so full rn I was lucky my boss gave me time off to mentally wrap my head around this but I have no clue where to even start he’s just getting worse everyday

SusanB-dil

Hi brit801 - welcome to 'here', but sorry for the reason.

Although a Neurologist is a great help, I'm sorry his pcp lost his temper. Bloodwork is very helpful in ruling out a lot of other issues and even confirming things. And I'm sure a scan may even put a step ahead with a Neurologist.

I would make an appointment with a Neurologist - and a PCP with more experience with someone with dementia. If a doctor lost his temper with me instead of being understanding, I would find someone else immediately.

Sorry you are dealing with 'this'. Dad is blessed to have you watching out for him.

harshedbuzz

Hi and welcome. I'm sorry for your reason to be here but pleased you found this place.

Was it your dad or the PCP who was angry? I read it as dad because you "threw him under the bus", as it were. Ideally your concerns should have been shared privately with the PCP. I always use my parents' electronic portal (I have signed HIPAA forms) or email. Others have written short notes with their concerns to be shared with the doctor before they enter the exam room. During visits, I sit behind the parent in sightline of the doctor so I can non-verbally confirm/contradict their reporting as needed.

I would do whatever is necessary to get the imagining and bloodwork done. There are conditions that have similar symptoms that are treatable if caught early. My dad had a vitamin deficiency caused by alcohol use that responded well to treatment so long as he could maintain sobriety and until his Alzheimer's hit the moderate stage. Mom had Lyme Disease; some of her symptoms improved with a course of antibiotics. A friend's mom had a tumor and a prognosis of months. Knowing this allowed her to pause her graduate studies for a semester and care for her mom.

Planning ahead for placement or taking over his IADLs, you'll need a dPOA or guardianship. If you don't have this, it's as important a step as the tests. A CELA is best here. If dad doesn't have a robust LTC policy and/or unlimited funds, you'll want to speak to the certified elder law attorney about strategies for qualifying for Medicaid in your dad's state.

If dad won't sign a POA or the lawyer deems him incompetent to sign, you'll need to obtain guardianship through the courts which is more expensive and time consuming. In both situations where someone I knew had to go the guardianship route, the judge ordered neurocognitive testing and a full medical exam as part of the process.

HB

brit801wvc

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/233717#Comment_233717

sorry my message was confusing but thank you for your help and understanding.. it was my dad that lost his temper in the meeting but they didn’t really seem knowledgeable either on his symptoms so I agree def gonna see a diff doctor for him

brit801wvc

Man so much good info thank you so much imma look into POA for sure.. my moms still competent so she can help with placement too I just got lost but you’ve helped a lot so I’ll try to get him to do his scan soon and will be more discreet next appointment too thank u again

SusanB-dil

Ooh.. ok. Sorry about that misunderstanding. No worries, though. I agree with HB assessment and suggestions.

I often use the patient portal to communicate with Mil doc, which works well, too.