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Initial transition from home to care facility

Sunissetting
Sunissetting Member Posts: 1 Member
I’ve been told to expect an immediate health decline when my parent is placed in a care facility.

My M is extremely anti-social and my biggest concern is her thriving in this environment.

Can anyone share their experiences in
detail?

Comments

  • SusanB-dil
    SusanB-dil Member Posts: 1,316
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    Member

    Hi Sunissetting - welcome to 'here', but sorry for the reason.

    There are a LOT of folks on this forum who would disagree that there is immediate decline. There is certainly a period of adjustment for PWD as well as family. My mom adjusted fairly quickly, was content and was probably happier.

    Unfortunately, there can be, but in a lot of placements, that is not the case. Many times, our LO can actually do better.

  • H1235
    H1235 Member Posts: 719
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    My mom was and still is very bitter and angry about the move. But, overall I think she is doing good. She enjoys talking with friends she has made and I think she likes having her own space (she lived with my brother). She also has a reason to get dressed in the morning. At my brothers she would often just stay in her pajamas all day. We did not see a decline. But everyone is different. If she has been living alone and not properly taking care of herself you may even see a bit of an improvement. We saw some improvements with mom when we moved her from her house in with my brother.

  • kblau
    kblau Member Posts: 81
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    Member

    After my mom’s move I saw cognitive improvement after the first month. It amazed me. Being in the right environment helped her. However she still emotionally struggles with feeling scared and alone. But that is also bc of the stage she is at.

  • mabelgirl
    mabelgirl Member Posts: 283
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    I was pleasantly surprised by how well my mom did with her move to AL. Even now as she has taken some quick declines she’ll tell people she walks around the community to visit friends. We just chuckle to ourselves because she barely gets out of bed these days but we think she enjoyed it while she could. Prayers for positive thinking.

  • Quilting brings calm
    Quilting brings calm Member Posts: 2,664
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    A move of any sort ( new home, Facility, hospital stay) can result in something called delirium. This can result in increased confusion etc for a few weeks until the person settles back into a routine. However, also consider the fact that a facility ensures they are getting meals, snacks, activities, socialization and someone checking on them regularly. Depending on the level of care, they will be getting their medication managed, shower help etc. I feel my parents got much better care than they did before the move into assisted living - and definitely more than they could have managed as their illnesses progressed. Much better care than I could have given them.

  • Mint
    Mint Member Posts: 2,930
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    my mother has been much more contented since placed. I think she feels safer. She has continued to maybe even show a little increase in her cognitive decline, but she’s happy there.

  • agosling
    agosling Member Posts: 1
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    I saw this with my MIL diagnosed with dementia and psychosis. The city social worker forced my husband into quickly finding a skilled nursing facility w a locked Al wing. We did and i got her settled. She was verbal and agitated. Within weeks, she became withdrawn. Within months she became nonverbal and her hands and feet curled up as she speny most of her days in bed. She died a few years later. I am hopeful that her nonverbal/nonresponsive years were pain-free for her. My husband and i could not care for her on our own but it was still rough on him when she finally died.

    Currently my sister and I are caring for my mom, still living at home, with Al. She has caregivers helping thruout the week. I've alerted my sister to the very real possibility that mom will decline rapidly should we need to put her in a facility. We are praying it doesn't come to that and some other event will take mom peacefully in her sleep. She's about to turn 85, living w post-stroke Al since Dec 2020 and doing remarkably well.

  • psg712
    psg712 Member Posts: 457
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    edited January 24

    Each person has his/her own journey. I got a lot of agitation from mom before her move to AL, once she realized it was not just talk and was really happening. When she actually moved in, she relaxed and adjusted much more quickly than I had hoped. I was surprised that her memory was already poor enough that old friends were soon out of sight, out of mind. With regard to her overall health, she did better in AL with observant caregivers and the fact that I was 10 min away instead of 400 miles away.

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
Read more