New skills

BPS

My wife was a home maker so she did all most all the cooking and cleaning, then about 3 years ago I was doing all the house work. I bought her some new pants and just yesterday I figured out how to thread the sewing machine and hem her pants up. No big deal but I never thought about doing all those things. My wife is in MC so now I am learning to be alone. I went to see her today and she was mad it me because she thinks I have a girlfriend so I am a little depressed. I have read posts of people learning home and auto repairs and learning yard Maintenace. What are some things others have learned due to this _______disease. Is there any good news.

WIGO23

DH was the ultimate handyman before this disease. I now have learned some basic plumbing—- changing out a leaky faucet! Also, I can now assemble furniture—-a bookcase! I can even trim his mustache. (He has hand tremors). So, yes, I can do more than before. I long for the days when he still could though.

Biggles

New skills and changes start slowly and build up. The sudden realisation that I was doing all the driving, and mowing the lawn with maintenance thrown in, mending fence pailing’s, skulls with electric drills and saws, chipping tiles off the wall and retiling, flicking the switch in the electrical box after a storm outage, plumbing stuff, even just turning on the gas barbecue, tuning in a new tv, solving computer installation problems and downloading apps for an online conference. Ahggg! All things my DH would do with ease and I have had to chew my fingernail's and learn. Mission accomplished but I desperately wish it wasn’t so. Ps well done with the sewing machine.

Cranddi

I've learned more than I've ever imagined about shopping for women's clothes. My DW has always loved to shop for clothes, wandering around the store touching everything, trying things on, etc. I've always been the know what you want, run in, get it, run out kind of shopper. At early stage 5 she still loves to shop. Unfortunately, she doesn't know what she needs, doesn't know any sizes and would forget why she went into a fitting room if I didn't go with her. Weight change has made it necessary to buy new clothes, so I now have figured out all her new sizes, including bras (not as easy as you'd think😂). Seeing her smile is worth all the glares I get when I go with her into a fitting room. I know she probably won't be able to do this much longer.

RetiredTeacher

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/71875/new-skills

I spent today pruning the oleander and photinias in the backyard and am slowly bit surely tackling a bamboo thicket with many very thick dead canes intermixed with bramble wild climbing roses. Whipped, scraped and bruised but not deterred, I am tackling the many projects my DH used to take care of. He is no longer able to help and doesn't want me doing it but after years of neglect I felt driven to start making progress. We've gone from stagnation to decline, both the yard and my husband. I did the inside of the house, he did the outside. I can't stand the overgrown yard anymore so in addition to taking care of him every day and the house, I now am learning about yard maintenance. I've done all I can with the long handled pruners so now I need to master the pole saw....thank goodness for YouTube! What doesn't kill us makes us stronger...

fmb

Good for you for learning the sewing machine, BPS! That is a handy skill to have regardless of your gender.

I'm sorry your DW thinks you have a girlfriend, but infidelity accusations are common in dementia. You just have to remember that it's the disease talking, not your loving wife.

One thing I am grateful for now that I am in Stage 8 is that I learned at an early age how to do a lot of traditionally male tasks. I mow grass, fix the roof, repair appliances, handle car maintenance (and know when to outsource to the dealer when necessary), handle basic plumbing and electrical issues and know when to call the experts. I'm limited more by lack of strength than knowledge. There is a youtube video out there for almost any situation. So many women I know don't have a clue and are in a real panic when something happens. I would joke with DH that I was the only woman he dated who came with her own power tools and knew how to use them!

The one thing I need to learn how to do better is handle investments. I have done the household bill paying and bookkeeping for years, and even file our taxes (TurboTax). DH was a savvy investor, a skill I need to work on.

One thing I am definitely going to outsource to the experts is probating his will. Too many ways to get tripped up. I know when I'm in over my head.

trottingalong

I’m impressed with the sewing machine. I’m decent at hand stitching but never liked the sewing machine. I’ve learned a lot of handy tricks and repairs from watching YouTube videos. My husband was very handy at pretty much everything. Now it all falls on me. I’ve always done yard work because I love doing it. I also have always owned horses so I’m good at hauling and fixing some things in the barn. Now I’m working on cars ( minor work), fixing garage door openers and repairing yard equipment.

Jgirl57

Good job with the sewing machine! False accusations are hard, sorry . Today I replaced the potty seat and lid and added safety side rails for the potty. My DH was using the towel bar to get up from the potty and that was an accident waiting to happen . I did feel kind of proud of myself. I hope you keep learning new things