The Laugh & Cry Moment of the Day

CampCarol

Ok, just venting here, but…DH leaked a bit into the multiple pairs of pants he wears (still trying to find some sort of disposables he will tolerate). He didn't say anything; I found them over on the air purifier and threw them into the laundry. This happens frequently, no big deal. I then asked if he would wash himself before dressing again, and he said he already had. I went to help him put on new bottoms and his entire genital area was blue! It's toothpaste and dried up already to boot! He howled when I tried to get it off with a wet cloth; I'm not sure what to do next. He hasn't showered in who knows how long, so I can't just hose him down with warm water. When I first figured out what happened, it was hard not to laugh in his face, now I'm trying not to cry. 🤦‍♀️

ButterflyWings

Oh my- I remember those days. We really do have to laugh when we can, to keep from crying.

Gotta give him an A for effort! And I’d try shaving cream to soften & moisturize before you wash/wipe him again. It helps with all kinds of messy clean-up jobs as he progresses, if you know what I mean.

You could be trying to clean up dried brown stuff, which many of us have gotten used to 🙃.

Pat6177

thanks for the grin!

Marchbanks

Well I certainly could have used some minty freshness this morning. Two very messy episodes, one in bed resulting in the usual steps of stripping him, cajoling him into the shower, washing him, dressing him, cleaning the shower, mopping the floor, starting laundry and remaking the bed. Then I notice he doesn’t smell so great….

If anyone can recommend a good disposable brand please let me know. He refuses all attempts to get him to wear them which creates so much more work for me.

LJCHR

My DH was wearing depends but it only protects the front - and he needs the back protected also. He has been using a product from Northshore. They are briefs that protect front and back and I order them in black. He says they are the most comfortable ones he has ever worn. They are a little pricey but he only uses 2 a day. He uses the lite absorbancy and they make a super absorbancy. They also make a disposable bag that holds 2 briefs and I tie and toss every day. It keeps the odor down. I tried the adult diaper caddy and they wear out very quickly and it holds so many briefs it is not only heavy to dispose, I found that there was still an odor. Northshore also makes a wipe but to me generic baby wipes are just as good. I have provided a link for you to review. Also, the products below are what we use. I have been ordering them about a year now and very happy with them. I hope this helps - it is indeed a big problem:

Premium Extreme Absorbency Adult Diapers and Incontinence Products

annie51

You can’t make this stuff up! They do so many crazy things and it’s hard to keep your eye on everything all the time. That toothpaste must not have felt too good in that area.🥴 Tonight my DH had the remote in his hand while watching me make cookies. He asked me where to put it and I said over by my chair where we were watching TV. I came back to the living room and there’s the remote sitting in my water glass. I need to remember not to assume he knows what I’m saying. Many incidents lately of doing weird things that needed “adjustment”.

Carl46

I have learned to tell DW to "Put these meds in your mouth and drink some water" rather than "take these with water." The latter can be interpreted to mean "drop these meds into the water glass and drink."

Marchbanks

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/235490#Comment_235490

Thanks so much! Just ordered these. I know some people suggest removing all their regular underwear but I think he would just refuse to wear any underwear. Fingers crossed I can get him to try these.

Palmetto Peg

I got my husband to wear the pull-ups by pretending to see a bad rash on his privates. In spite of how much he has declined, he is still very concerned about protecting the family jewels. I suggested that we just try them until the "rash" cleared up and I added a little Vaseline on him to make it more believable. After a while I just disappeared the regular underwear and when he asked me about it I told him that I read that certain brands of underwear could cause a rash and that I was researching which to buy that wouldn't have that effect. Rinse and repeat! I am completely over any guilt about the fiblets. My needs matter, too, and as long as it doesn't harm him in any way, I'm going with it!

Palmetto Peg

BTW, CampCarol, your DH may very well have a little rash after the toothpaste incident. Make the most of it! 😁

CampCarol

TY all for your comments! It doesn’t seem to be bothering him, and he doesn’t want me to try to clean it again. (But when I do, I will definitely try the toothpaste recommendation. I think I recall reading about that perviously on some older threads.). I’m also looking into some disposable or washable incontinence underwear for him and appreciate the recommendation above. The bigger trick will be how to explain this to the Urologist at our appointment Tuesday because it will still probably be there! 😉

cdgbdr

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/235487#Comment_235487

I learned of the Parentgiving site here. I am using the black disposables for DH. They are a bit pricey but the best I've found so far. He likes the black color as it seems more like regular undies to him.

Lgb35

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/235523#Comment_235523

you must follow up and let us know how that goes 😜

Biggles

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/235495#Comment_235495

ha ha what a lovely laugh I had so sorry I do hope the remote still works,

M5M

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/235523#Comment_235523

CampCarol, use shaving cream to remove the toothpaste and anything else that might be an issue…..Hopefully you just typed toothpaste when you were thinking about using shaving cream to clean!

annie51

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/235561#Comment_235561

Biggles, surprisingly after letting it dry, the remote did work. In the meantime I had reprogrammed a second one from the spare TV and now I have a backup!

eaglemom

The title says it all: the laugh and cry moment. You handled it perfectly. If, per chance, he's still 'blue' at the appointment maybe the urologist will help in that area. Sometimes someone else suggesting cleaning up, etc goes over much better than their loving caregiver suggesting it.

I really like all of the suggestion and idea's everyone's shared here. Excellent information.

eagle

Russinator

Shaving cream - never thought of that - going to give it a try - thanks for the heads up

CampCarol

Thank you everybody, the shaving cream worked! And while he was still a little blue for the urologist appointment today, I was able to explain what happened to the medical assistant in the hall. She was able to give the doctor a heads-up so he wasn’t smurfed! 😊 Thank you, thank you for this forum, what peace of mind it gives me knowing you all have my back!