Financial crisis in the making part 2

6isenough

I had posted here a couple of weeks ago. You are all so wonderful to have given me advice, which I am following through on as well as I am able.

My dh is not able to make sensible decisions about money and his healthcare. He needs to see his neurologist and his primary care doctor. He has an appointment for the neurologist in July!? He won’t call and ask for an earlier appointment. He won’t make an appointment with his be PCP even though he has some chronic health issues that he is suffering from. My dh has appointed me as his Health Care Representative. Who decides when I can step in and facilitate the healthcare that he needs?
I am not, however, the DPOA. I have been communicating with the appointees and they have been, I think, trying to help me. I have been referred to an American Assoc. of Daily Money Managers representative. When I asked my husband to consider accepting this kind of help he told me he already has a financial advisor. This advisor is a CFP, ChFC, CLU. I suppose this advisor could help but I know that my dh has not contacted him. I don’t think he will. Also, he is not local.
I keep hoping my husband will decide to cooperate but, as many of you have said, I may have to become more aggressive in getting him the financial and health care services that he needs. Fingers crossed.

Thank you all for being here.

Gator1976

It’s time for you to take control, completely. Take the steps to complete this task. After you have the legal authority, take action and take control of everything he might try and get his hands on. Don’t ask anymore, explain confidently, outlining what “we” are going to do. When he resists, explain to him he doesn’t have to worry about any of that anymore. Remove him from meeting and consult with “your” advisors.

Lkrielow99

I am sorry you are dealing with this. If you believe the DPOA’s are not stepping up and supporting you, can you ask your attorney about removing them and having him placed under your guardianship? Guardianship is appointed by the judge. My experience with my DH with Alzheimer’s and financial intuitions, nursing homes, stockbrokers, realtors, actually everyone has asked to see my DPOA. You may not get a meeting or actions necessary without the authorization. I hope it doesn’t have to go that far, but you will need to be prepared for the worse. Again, I am so very sorry. This is a horrible disease that affect caregivers so much. Much love to you. 🥰

Jgirl57

You decide . As far as the medical, you will need to make, manage and get him to the medical appointments. He may seem like he is still capable of doing these things, but he is not. So sorry these early stages are so difficult .

6isenough

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/237491#Comment_237491

I have one chance to avoid getting a lawyer involved. I have talked to the DPOA’s and a financial advisor. All parties agreed to a phone consultation and, if everyone is willing, to create a binding contract for all of us to sign to avoid any further conflict between us. I absolutely agree with you. My dh needs to be free from having to deal with the financial burden he can no longer handle. I have never been good at being aggressive. Today I take the low road and hope to meet everyone at the end.

Thank you for your support.