Have any questions about how to use the community? Check out the Help Discussion.

First my DH, now my mother

fmb
fmb Member Posts: 546
500 Care Reactions 250 Likes 500 Comments 100 Insightfuls Reactions
Member
in Caring For a Spouse or Partner

As many of you know, my DH, Roger, died January 21. I was just beginning to come to terms with his death when I was dealt another blow this week, only 6-1/2 weeks after his death.

My mother, who for the past 14 mos. was in memory care in our hometown 1000 miles away, died Friday afternoon (March 7). On February 24, she had fallen and broken her femur below the hip joint. Because of her severe Alzheimer's and heart failure, we children opted to not have the break surgically repaired. Already in hospice care, she was kept as comfortable as possible. It appeared that she had a stroke on Ash Wednesday, and she stopped eating and drinking. We three kids all live out of state, but my brother (the POA) flew in and was at her side with other local relatives when she died. Thanks to the compassionate care of the hospice team, she had a peaceful death.

Ever since our father died from Alzheimer's almost six years ago, she had wanted nothing more than to die so she could be with him in heaven. God finally mercifully granted her wish. Even though we knew this day was coming, we are devastated.

Comments

  • hiya
    hiya Member Posts: 90
    25 Likes 25 Care Reactions 10 Comments First Anniversary
    Member

    I’m so sorry for your loss. Praying for you

  • Biggles
    Biggles Member Posts: 339
    500 Care Reactions 250 Likes 100 Comments 25 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    I’m so sorry life sends us so very many challenges and such sadness take care.

  • Biggles
    Biggles Member Posts: 339
    500 Care Reactions 250 Likes 100 Comments 25 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member
  • Quilting brings calm
    Quilting brings calm Member Posts: 2,706
    2500 Comments 500 Insightfuls Reactions 500 Care Reactions 500 Likes
    Member

    I’m so sorry for your loss. Rest, take each day slowly - just get one or two things done. The cumulative effect is going to make it hard to do more.

  • SDianeL
    SDianeL Member Posts: 1,302
    500 Likes 1000 Comments 500 Care Reactions 250 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    I’m so sorry. Praying for your strength and comfort. Hugs. 🙏💜

  • psg712
    psg712 Member Posts: 469
    100 Care Reactions 100 Likes 100 Comments 25 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    I am very sorry for the loss of your mother. Peace and comfort to you.

  • Karen711
    Karen711 Member Posts: 119
    100 Comments 25 Likes 25 Care Reactions First Anniversary
    Member

    fmb- I’m very sorry for your loss. I hope you find some comfort that she wanted to go and be with her DH in heaven, and now she’s made the journey. Peace and rest to you!

    Karen

  • Pat6177
    Pat6177 Member Posts: 464
    100 Likes Third Anniversary 100 Comments 25 Care Reactions
    Member

    it doesn’t matter how old we are when we lose a parent - it’s so painful. I’m very sorry for your loss.

  • harshedbuzz
    harshedbuzz Member Posts: 4,898
    Eighth Anniversary 1,000 Likes 2500 Comments 500 Care Reactions
    Member

    I am so sorry for two profound losses in so short a period of time. I wish you peace and strength as you go forward.

    HB

  • ImMaggieMae
    ImMaggieMae Member Posts: 1,079
    1000 Comments 250 Likes Third Anniversary 100 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    I am so sorry for your loss. Losing two loved ones in such a short period of time is just too much. Prayers for you and your family.

  • Joe C.
    Joe C. Member Posts: 1,007
    Fifth Anniversary 500 Comments 100 Insightfuls Reactions 100 Care Reactions
    Member

    My sincere condolences on the loss of your mother. May you find some peace in the days ahead.

  • JeriLynn66
    JeriLynn66 Member Posts: 1,004
    250 Likes 500 Comments 100 Care Reactions 25 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    @fmb , I am so sorry for the loss of your Dear Mother. May the Lord grant you peace and comfort in the coming days. You are in our prayers.

  • Mint
    Mint Member Posts: 2,976
    Eighth Anniversary 2500 Comments 250 Likes 100 Care Reactions
    Member

    Wishing you comfort and peace during this difficult time.

  • CampCarol
    CampCarol Member Posts: 171
    100 Likes 100 Care Reactions 100 Comments 25 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    My sincere condolences on the loss of your mother. Sending thoughts and prayers your way during this difficult time.

  • CindyBum
    CindyBum Member Posts: 374
    500 Care Reactions 250 Likes 100 Insightfuls Reactions 100 Comments
    Member

    I am so very sorry for your loss. Peace be with you.

  • midge333
    midge333 Member Posts: 435
    250 Likes 100 Insightfuls Reactions 100 Care Reactions 100 Comments
    Member

    I am sorry for your loss.

  • ALCB
    ALCB Member Posts: 49
    10 Comments 5 Likes
    Member

    I'm so sorry, fmb. Thinking of you and your family today and sending strength.

  • housefinch
    housefinch Member Posts: 465
    100 Care Reactions 100 Insightfuls Reactions 100 Likes 100 Comments
    Member

    I’m so sorry. How devastating.

  • Jgirl57
    Jgirl57 Member Posts: 575
    500 Comments Fourth Anniversary 100 Likes 25 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    Peace to you and your siblings. So very sorry

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
Read more

Community Guidelines


Click here to review the ALZConnected Community Guidelines

Categories