Feeling So Sad

Biggles

what do you do when sadness overtakes you. Today coming home in the car with my DH of 54 years he asked who are you?

Carl46

Biggles, I am sorry. I am experiencing some of the same with my wife of 57 years.

I have taken antidepressants for 30 years, and they help. When sadness overtakes me, I find something to do (walking in the sunshine is especially good) and something to laugh at. Sometimes I post on here.

Sometimes I stress eat, which is not helpful. Drinking alcohol and listening to country music are even less helpful. I avoid most TV shows, because they are depressing, but nature shows are good.

The best thing I have done recently is enroll DW in adult day care five afternoons a week. Instead of being annoyed with me by the end of the day, she is really glad to see me, and my stress level is way down. I can get things done that I need to do and can have some time for myself.

charley0419

I’m so so sorry as that first time must hurt deep. I myself think of that day every day. Keep the faith

midge333

My DW is starting to lose who I am and it is truly heartbreaking. After all we have been through, I didn't think it would bother me but it bothers me profoundly.

White Crane

Dear Biggles, we cope one day at a time and sometimes one minute at a time. I’m sorry it’s so hard and so sad. I understand the sadness. It never completely leaves me even when I’m laughing. Sending you a great big hug and lots of love.

Brenda

annie51

I can’t help but have a cry…more often lately. As much as I try to do this out of sight of DH, sometimes the sadness is overwhelming. I try very hard after that to change my mood and move on…for me, this is not easy. Had to do it today!

Jazzma

Cry, a lot. I always used to hold my emotions in but now it's impossible. People are surprisingly understanding, even the lady at the post office when I burst into tears. I've also tried breathing exercises (inhale to a count of 4, hold for a count of 6, exhale for a count of 4) which help. Sometimes the pain is so bad I have to remind myself that I won't die of sadness. It's just very hard. I hope that there is someone you can talk to — my brother is used to getting my calls any time of day or night when things are overwhelming. Wishing you better days.

trottingalong

Biggles, I’m so sorry. I’m pretty upbeat overall, but when I have those days I’m pretty much useless. I just want to crawl into my bed and cry. I don’t even have the luxury of doing that, so like a robot, I feed the dogs, do the laundry and fix meals for my DH. I have been known to go sit in my car just long enough to scream at the top of my lungs. It helps.

June45

My husband has been gone for almost 3 years. The sadness never really goes away. But it isn't as intense as it once was. After a good cry, reading a good book takes my mind somewhere else and helps. Jazzma mentioned calling a brother. My sister talked me off the ledge many times.

WIGO23

Biggles, I think we each find our path through sadness as best we can. Sometimes I wade in the pity pond for a bit. Sometimes I dive in and get fully immersed. But I try to cope this way: I will feel this sad pain for the next fifteen minutes. I will cry, if I need to. I will journal my sadness, if I need to.

Then I move on to a task, a distraction like a walk (even if in the house), put on some 60’s music and try to dance, read a bit, work on a puzzle—whatever helps me to focus on something other than the overwhelming sadness that grabbed me.
Rinse and repeat!

Biggles

it’s so good and comforting to talk to people who understand. I like breathing and I too have a wonderful older brother who lives away and I think I will talk to him more often. Thankyou

Biggles

Been there done that (screaming at the top of my voice in the car) and I’m usually upbeat untill it gets me. It’s nice to know you are not alone. Thankyou.

Biggles

Yes yes I can see myself in all you say - Thankyou hugs

Biggles

June45 Thankyou

Cathy coconis

I cry…as I am now. It just builds up and sometimes I feel better.Mostly I go day by day… I have some things that i can do to distract myself. I do watercolor painting because I can just lose myself in it. Time passes quickly. If I can I talk to friends that understand. Exercise does help even if I usually hate the thought of it. Listening to music I enjoy is good.

I know it's a sad situation. I'm sorry that we're all stuck in it, But we have one another

SDianeL

we understand completely. Sadness comes in waves. Each new behavior is like a gut punch. Sometimes we can’t even take time to cry. I tried to cope by keeping busy with something that didn’t allow me to think. Puzzles, art, music, genealogy. Sometimes I just went into the bathroom closed the door and cried. Hugs. 💜