Recent bedtime problem

annie51

We typically have gone to bed sometime between 10 and 11 every night. For a while now he falls asleep most days while we’re watching tv around 9:00-9:30. I try to keep him up a while longer or try to get him to go to bed and he refuses because it’s too early. Now when I wake him later to go to bed, we come to the bedroom and he just putters around, rearranging the sheets, turning all the lights on, looking at everything - then when I suggest coming to bed with me he says no. So I try (and fail) to fall asleep while he putters around the house with all the lights on, comes into our room and turns on the light and says “how are you doing” white I’m trying to sleep. Sometimes he makes his way back to our bed a couple hours later, sometimes I find him slumped in a chair sleeping and try to get him up and in the bed. He will either sleep very late (today he’s still asleep at 10:30) or get up early and want to “get going”.

My question is, how important is a consistent sleep time, or is it ok as long as he’s sleeping at all? I hate to wake him if I don’t need to but I also don’t want to create another problem but letting him sleep weird disjointed hours.

Sorry for the long rambling.

Arrowhead

Biological clocks are another among the things that get altered in the course of this disease. You can either fight it and be constantly frustrated over it or adjust to it. Adjusting to it will make things easier for both of you. That applies to all the senseless changes that the person goes through.

cdgbdr

My DH has slept in the recliner for years due to other health issues. I'm not strict about times but need my rest too. Sometimes he does odd things while I'm sleeping but no disasters yet. He usually looks for a snack or sorts through his clothes looking for something else to wear. My biggest issuecis that if he naps in the early evening, when he wakes up he thinks it's the next day. All that to say, routines are good but I wouldn't sacrifice my rest or take a hard line on it.

harshedbuzz

The most critical aspect of this situation is assuring the 24/7 caregiving spouse is getting adequate sleep. This can be a challenge as sleep fragmentation develops with the disease progression.

Sometimes keeping a PWD awake and engaged to encourage longer overnight sleep but sometimes this further dysregulates their behavior. One option is if you can sleep when he does. Many caregivers add medication of some kind to help with sleep issues. Dad's disordered sleep was impacting mom's health so we increased his Seroquel to help him sleep longer at night.

HB

Kat63

Sleep fragmentation is frequently a problem as the disease progresses. My DH has suffered with this for a couple of years and have had to adjust and increase medication to help. Just recently he would fall asleep around 8:30 and then wake when it was time for me to go to bed and refused to go to bed with me. He actually was as uncooperative as he has been anytime during our 10 years of dealing with this disease. He is under hospice care and they added gabapetin to his Seroquel and melatonin he is taking. It has helped as he goes to bed easily and is sleeping better.
My DH also said “Lets go” a lot. It took me probably too long, but figured out he was more asking what are we doing. I have just been answering his question with something like, “well today is Monday and we need to have breakfast right now”. He accepts that and seems to be what he needed.

annie51

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/239614#Comment_239614

You’re right about the “Let’s go”…I hear that all the time and it does work to focus on something like a meal or a cleaning task. If we sit too long in the house though, he does say we have to “get out of here” and I have to think of someplace to go for a walk or errand.