How to Persuade Loved One to accept Day Care or Home Help?

Kweisser

My family has just intervened, to help me accept that DH should no longer be home alone. I’ve tried to persuade him that we need more household help, but apart from periodic cleaners he doesn’t want anyone else in the home. He is still strong and able bodied, but making so many poor decisions. I do think he would benefit from going to a day program, but he still insists he is able to care for himself while I am at work. Also, he is getting more aggressive. How have others handled this? Thank you!

SusanB-dil

Please tell his doc that he has become more aggressive. There are meds that can dial that back without becoming zombied. Seroquel has been a big help with MIL.

You could try telling him that the adult daycare is a senior center. Someone posted that they told their LO that he would be helping them instead of the other way around. For in-home help, sometimes it also works to tell your LO that you are helping the person coming in… a CNA needing more hours or experience for their certification, for example, or someone who just needs more hours to help with cost-of-living, perhaps.

MN Chickadee

Could you attend the day program with him the first few times? Call it a senior coffee club or whatever may fly. Then after a couple short days you find reasons to need to leave, such as a doctor appt. You probably need to find the right therapeutic fib for someone in the home as well. A friend of your kids down on their luck and you have hired her to help out to be charitable, or a student who needs contact hours with seniors for her degree etc. Or just call them a house cleaner and you happen to have appointments when they come. No need to tell him what the actual deal is. After a few weeks they may be able to move from cleaning to more interaction with him as he adjusts but it does take a long time for people to adjust.