Been a long 6 years

sixcats

My BH, age 65 now, is very close to the end of his journey. If someone has a “to do” list I would love feedback.

CindyBum

xoxo

Timmyd

I love your photo. My ask (somewhat selfish) is that you keep us updated on your journey. Reading the stories here about people who have traveled the path I am on has been invaluable. You are my people and this is my community.

SDianeL

so sorry you are at this point. I’ve been there. Is he under hospice care? If so, they have counselors and Social Workers who can help you. Just ask the hospice nurse. The facility also knows what to do. Keep talking to him. He can hear you. We are here for you. Sending love and hugs. 💜

sixcats

yes, Jimmy is in hospice care. However his hospice team at Silverado Beverly Place are totally useless. Sad but true. At least the skilled caregivers there are, and always been, so wonderful. Thanks for bringing this up. I need to talk to the administrator. Also am looking into a “death doula”

sixcats

Karen711

((💜)), wonderful photo of the two of you!

ronda b

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/241206#Comment_241206

Ask for a different hospice group. You are allowed to.

WIGO23

I have no advice to offer. But I do offer caring concern for fellow travelers on this most difficult journey. I hope that as the journey comes to an end, it is as easy and peaceful as it can be.

Russinator

((HUGS))

Russinator

My heart goes out to you.

Anna2022

@sixcats My heart goes out to you as you manage these days. I wish you and your DH a gentle journey.

Vitruvius

My DW is at a similar late stage. She is 73 and has been Stage 7f for about four months. This week her MCF and hospice both informed me that she has had a noticeable decline and that probably indicates her time is now quite short. She eats very little and is eating less by the day. She accepts food when you tap her lip with a spoonful, otherwise you would think she was comatose.

As far as a to-do list, I haven’t done much. I have contacted a funeral service. She has a rare dementia (Semantic Dementia) and the University who confirmed her diagnosis indicated they would welcome the opportunity to autopsy her brain (to confirm their ability to properly diagnose this dementia). Semantic Dementia is also not genetically caused (as far as they know) so a confirmation provides my children and grandchildren some relief that they are no more likely to get dementia than any random person.

Other than that I don’t know what else one can do but wait it out. I visit often and feed her. I talk to her but she is completely nonresponsive. Her hands are too contracted for me to hold them, otherwise I would. I advocate for her and seek frequent updates on her condition. If anyone has any other suggestions I would welcome them.

I am not doing any planning for my life “after”. I’ll wait for the grief to subside before moving on.

sixcats

Biggles

Your picture tells a thousand tales, it’s beautiful. I wish you a gentle journey, hugs xx

midge333

@sixcats: I hope your DH has a quick and painless death. What are the shortcomings of your current hospice team? I agree with @rhonda b, if your are unhappy with your current hospice team, ask for a different one.

Carl46

All I can suggest is, don't make any major financial or lifestyle decisions for a year after his passing. If you love him half as much as the picture shows, you won't be thinking straight for a while. Give yourself time to grieve.

I'm in the same boat with you. Take care of yourself and have a blessed Easter.

sixcats

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/241295#Comment_241295

the current hospice team, incompetent and basically not present. The come in for a few minutes once a week. So, thank you for your input re: hospice. I have ducks in a row for hiring a new hospice team Monday.