Next Steps

esteinwallace

Hello! I'm new to this group and glad to be here.

Wondering what I should be considering for next steps. My DH has MCI which is getting worse. So far, he still takes good care of himself. I prepare all meals, make sure he takes his meds, try to keep him active (He tends to sit and fall asleep otherwise). If I have to leave the house for a meeting and he can't go with me, I leave him big sticky notes saying where I am and when I'll be back. That seems to help keep him oriented. I also take the car keys, so he won't go for a drive and get lost. We do memory stuff each day, practicing names of family members, dates, etc.

But more often he is forgetting what our relationship is. Usually at night. I can usually bring him back fairly easily - but it is scary as I don't know what will happen if I can't get him back. I can tell when he is confused as he will ask me not to sleep close to him or something similar.

Do I need to begin looking for in home care to help? Something else?

Thank you for your thoughts.

Jgirl57

Welcome; I do think it would be wise to start introducing some home help to get him used to the idea . Even if it is someone to play cards, checkers or dominoes for a bit with him. It won’t be long before he can not be home alone. That’s good that you are being proactive about the keys. This can be a long and unpredictable road so keep being proactive, this forum helped me not be so shocked as new stages and phases occurred . Glad you posted

SDianeL

yes I would get help now. I don’t think he should be left alone anymore. What if something happened? Would he know to call for help? Do you lock him in the house when you leave? If not, he could wander off and be in danger. If so, could he get out if something happened? When my DH was evaluated for caregiver support from the VA, the nurse asked him what he would do if there was a fire in the house. He said he would try to put it out. Not call 911. I was shocked. She told me later that I should no longer leave him alone. His reasoner was broken as someone posted here. I never left him alone after that.

H1235

Do you have all the legal things taken care of (DPOA, living will, will)? Keep in mind you might want to set up a DPOA for yourself, your husband will not be able to do this any longer. You want to make sure someone can step in if something happens to you. I would consider your home. Is it going to function as you need it as he progresses (main floor bedroom, bathrooms, laundry, shower rails, that kind of thing. You may not intend to move him to memory care, but it might not hurt to gather some information about what is available. Will you be able to manage the house on your own? In my experience things never go as planned and having a backup plan may be helpful. I agree with others that it might be good to get him used to having someone else in the house now and then. If you don’t need it for him have someone come in and clean for you. It might also be good to see get him used to an adult senior center.