MC 1 week and major decline

hiya

I did finally place DH in MC. The building up to it was gut wrenching, however, after I felt a sense of relief knowing he has 24/7 and me some freedom.
The first few days went well. Evenings somewhat challenging but not too bad. Suddenly everything changed. DH angry outbursts early afternoon. He goes in and out of every resident’s rooms trying to get out ( this is upsetting to female residents). He doesn’t eat much and has moved from using a knife and fork to someone handing him finger food. Had his first ever bowel accident and refused a shower for over 5 hours to clean him. He was fully continent a week ago. Eventually 2 aids helped shower him…but he was showering himself a week ago. Is this decline, confusion, environment? Has anyone experienced this fast decline starting MC? Has anyone’s loved ones improved after more time?

harshedbuzz

@hiya

It's really hard to say. The sudden drop in ability to function could be the result of an infection of some kind. Any older person (even without dementia) who has a sudden change in function or mental status needs to be tested for a UTI. URIs can also impact a PWD's ability to function.

But my hunch is that this might be a chicken or the egg situation. It's not so much that he "changed" because of the placement, but that you placed him because of the losses that that drove the need to.

I feel like sometimes spousal caregivers, especially, can't appreciate the huge amount of scaffolding they do in a day for their LOs. At meals, you were modeling the use of a knife and fork on foods familiar to him; that may not be happening in a MCF depending on who he's seated with. Was he truly independent in showering? Or did he need a verbal prompt from you? Did he lay out fresh and appropriate clothes for the day? Put the dirty ones in the hamper? Get his supplies in order? Adjust the temperature? Was he continent of stool because you knew his normal toileting habits and made sure he made his way to the bathroom as needed?

HB

tonyac2

I think you may be right HB, at least in my situation. Your comment caused me to think of all the prep work I do in advance so I can say my DH can do so and so. Take away all the props and I’m sure it would be a different outcome.

trottingalong

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/244926#Comment_244926

It wouldn’t hurt to also have him tested for a UTI. My DHs only symptom of one was a drastic change in his ability to think, complete tasks and wandering.

Dio

Your story is very similar to what happened to my DH, although at home he was already being difficult about showering, hygiene or changing out of soiled diapers...which was one of the many reasons I had to place him in MCF. He became very aggressive and combative in the MCF and declined within 4 months until we found a medication that calmed his brain, so to speak. He's now almost like a normal person. It's still a conundrum of sorts. What meds is your DH taking? It's truly trial and error when it comes to finding the right combo. It was the MCF director's insistence that the neuro finally relented and added depakote. Now, because of the positive results, the neuro is questioning whether DH truly has dementia. So be it as it may…but why can't anyone figure this out?

SDianeL

Once my DH became incontinent while in MC he became more agitated and aggressive. They had to add Depakote. So if they rule out UTI it could be the progression. My DH about the same time also couldn’t feed himself. Like he forgot how.