Can’t figure out where he wants to go

annie51

The last few days DH has been trying to tell me about a place he wants to go, and for the life of me I can’t figure out what he’s talking about. His aphasia is so bad I can’t even make a guess. I have asked him questions to help clarify but that just leads to more nonsensical sentences. He describes it differently at different times and I can’t find a pattern. I feel so bad as I know it’s as frustrating for him as it is for me. I apologize to him that I can’t understand and try redirecting, but that only last so long. I hate this disease!!!

Biggles

Oh Annie how I feel for you and understand. My DH also has such bad Aphasia, sentences are almost impossible. Short words are ok but the rest as they say is word salad. It’s frustrating and so very sad. We have this strange communication now I pick up on one word and try to add to it. My DH was trying to talk about where we used to live not sure if it was positive or negative thoughts but I added all the good things about our new place and the things we do now. This goes on all the time I try to smile a lot and try not to show confusion but it’s hard. Conversations with others is impossible. It’s sole destroying. Take care you are not alone.

SDianeL

So sorry. It’s so difficult to watch. Sometimes it isn’t a place, it’s a feeling. Home is a feeling of comfort. He may be anxious. I would talk to the doctor about medication if it’s upsetting him. Best to just nod and say uh huh and change the subject or distract. Showing confusion or asking questions sometimes makes them more anxious.

SDianeL

this gives good tips on communicating with someone with dementia:

Vitruvius

This was a daily routine for us for many, many months. She did have aphasia due to her Semantic Dementia. But I quickly came to believe that my DW couldn’t articulate where she wanted to go not because of her aphasia, but because the place she “had” to go was little more than a vague notion or memory, not really a fully formed idea, nor was the reason she needed to go so badly. Many days she would load up the back seat of the car with all manner of random household objects and insist we need to take them somewhere which she could never describe. Attempts to help her to refine her vague notion were always fruitless and I quickly stopped trying as besides being pointless it agitated her. Instead I would take her out for a drive and after awhile she was usually moderately satisfied, even though we never actually stopped anywhere. That night after she went to bed I would unload the car. It took quite awhile for this routine to fade away as she declined.