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Sister care giver♥️

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I am 16 years younger then my sis who is now living with me and my Husband and grown children and my granddaughter . She is forgetting who we are earlier each day. And constantly wants to go home. I my sister has been my rock my whole life and I’m not sure I can keep doing this it’s making me sick , high blood pressure depression and anger. This is just the beginning I believe, she is 82 I am 66 I need advice on handling her moods .

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  • SDianeL
    SDianeL Member Posts: 1,751
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    Member

    welcome. Sorry about your sister. Read the book “The 36 Hour Day” which helped me after my DH diagnosis. Search online for caregiving videos for dementia. It’s not her, it’s the disease. Her brain is broken. You can’t reason with someone whose reasoner is broken. She wants to go home because of anxiety. Home is not a place it’s a feeling. It’s not moods that are causing her actions, it’s anxiety because of the disease. Talk to her doctor about medication to help her. Do you have a DPOA and HIPPA papers for her? Have you looked into senior day care or memory care for her? We know what you’re going through. Try to take a break from caregiving if only for a few hours for your mental and physical well being. Hugs. 💜

  • H1235
    H1235 Member Posts: 972
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    Member

    Many with dementia have anosognosia. This is the inability to recognize their symptoms and limitations. When you try to help a person with dementia they become angry, because they don’t realize they need help. It’s best to avoid any discussion of her limitations. Make other excuses for why you are doing things for her. If she says the sky is yellow, just go with it. There is no reason to correct her. Let her think she is making the decisions and calling the shots, but you do what really needs to be done. Use distractions to change difficult subjects. If you need to use fibs to ease her mind. If attached the 10 absolutes of dementia care. I hope this helps.

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Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
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