Bathing

idbehappy2

I live with my mom (88) who has AD. Getting her to bathe and wash her hair is a struggle and it ends up in a power struggle sometimes. She also won’t accept help with this. How can I support her independence but also assist her in maintaining good hygiene. I want to be respectful but she doesn’t understand and it’s getting to be a problem. Any suggestions?

Colacho10

I think it is all about your approach.

First, the environment. People with AD have a hard time regulating body temperature and can feel cold easily. Make sure the bathroom is very warm before she even enters. Get a shower chair, so she feels more secure.

Second, use strategic communication. Give her a choice and be flexible. Sometimes, it's just impossible to do it, and you should give up and try again when she is in a better mood. Also, distract her by talking about something unrelated to bathing.

If that doesn't work over time, you can try no-rinse shampoo and body wash. You can also do it in stages throughout the day. Wash her face and arms in the morning and her feet in the evening, for example.

It is still possible it won't work, and don't feel bad about it. It is a symptom of the disease, and you just need help. Maybe she would be more comfortable if you hired someone just for the bathing part. Sometimes, it is just possible that she is shy and would rather accept help from a professional than a family member.

Wish you luck, and update me if you can if something worked.

idbehappy2

Thank you so much for the suggestions!

SDianeL

I got my DH to shower 2 days per week after reading the book “The 36 Hour Day” which explained the reasons they don’t shower. They think they just showered. They forgot how to shower. They are afraid. The water hurts their skin. I got a chair for the shower and a hand held shower wand. I told him that we were going to shower on Mondays and Wednesdays. When the day came I would get his shower ready, towels, washcloth, body wash, etc, I would turn on the water warm but not hot and not full force. I would put his clean clothes on the bed face down so he would put them on the correct way. I would then announce to my DH that it was Monday our shower day and tell him his shower was ready. It worked most of the time. I did it right after breakfast when he was in a good mood. While he showered I took his dirty clothes and put them in the hamper. If he didn’t want to shower I would say OK then we can do it tomorrow. Then I would try again the next day. Hope this helps. 🤞💜