Having difficulty in getting mom help

hlp4mom

My mother is experiencing episodes of paranoia, loss of memory and irrational behavior and was taken to the hospital on numerous occasions. How do I get help with the process of being diagnosed with
Dementia/Alzheimers if she refuses to see her primary care physician?

H1235

Welcome. Could you get her to the pcp by telling her the visit is for something other than dementia(check her high blood pressure, diabetes etc)? People with dementia often have anosognosia this is the inability to recognize their symptoms or limitations. They often become very upset if memory or dementia are even mentioned. I would then bring in a letter to her doctor explaining what is happening. I wonder if the doctor may just do a referral to a neurologist based on the multiple hospital visits. This would be one less doctors visit. Another idea is at the next hospital visit request/demand a psychiatric evaluation. Explain everything that is happening. If she is considered a harm to herself(sounds like she would be) or others they will hopefully bring her to a geriatric psychiatric hospital for evaluation and proper medication to treat the symptoms. You may need to be a bit pushy.

hlp4mom

Thank

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/251977#Comment_251977

you great advice,

Colacho10

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/251977#Comment_251977

Great ideas, I agree.

I would just like to add that a social worker at the hospital might be able to help you figure out the best way to get a diagnosis and connect you with local resources.

Also, if your mom is still in the hospital, you could talk to the patient advocate. Their job is to help patients and their families, and they could assist you in getting the right kind of evaluation.

Anonymousjpl123

I’m so sorry that is very rough. Many of us have been there. Welcome to this little community - though I’m sorry for why you found us.

Unfortunately your situation is not uncommon. Two things make it harder: anasognia (probably spelled wrong), which means many people with dementia can’t grasp that something is really wrong (different from denial), and “shoe timing,” when some people with dementia can’t grasp work really hard to appear better than they are for short periods of time. Because of these things, many people are diagnosed only after a crisis. Your mom won’t go to a doctor, and when she does, diagnoses can be tricky.

My mom was ultimately diagnosed in the ER - because she didn’t have a primary, and the doctor we went to didn’t know much about her or or dementia. Fiblets - little white lies - can also work well. You can tell her she needs to go for her insurance.

good luck - it’s definitely not easy!